[Title music]
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~
[Croaks]
Hey, Clay! Check me out!
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
[Splash]
[Sighs]
- You know, Clay? - Yeah.
I'm really loving this life of perpetual
- magic realism we've created. - We got a good life.
I think that's gonna be my saying now.
I should make, like, 10 t-Shirts
that say... no, 20 t-shirts that say that.
What's taking Barf so dang long?
Hey, Barf! What's the holdup, man?
Uh, guys, this rope swing's too high, I think.
- No, it's not, man. - I mean, maybe it's too low, I think.
It's fine. Come on, do it!
Guys, I think I gained a lot of water weight last night
'cause I showered for too long by mistake.
Yeah, I got too much water weight right now.
- It's not gonna work. - Man, come on! What's wrong?
- You love doing the rope swing. - Yeah, I don't know.
Something doesn't feel right. I think I'm scared.
Barf, come on, man! You're psyching yourself out!
You don't have emotions. Remember, you're Mr. Cool.
Snap out of it! Here, watch my snaps.
[Snapping] Snap, snap, snap, snap.
Clay: Come on, Barf! You can do it!
[Gasps, shudders] Where am I?
[Gasps] A rope swing! Cool.
Wheee!
Hmm.
[Braking] [Grunts] It's okay. I'm okay.
Hey, Barf, dude. [Creaking]
- Let yourself down... - O.M.G.!
[Rumbling]
[Music playing]
[Gasping]
[Screaming]
Heh, boy.
[Clears throat]
Sowwy.
What is this [Bleep] ?! I can't read this!
It's backwards! [Screams]
Hey, Dottie, I'm gonna get something
heavy from my car. So I'm gonna leave
the door propped open.
Can you hold Gothfield for a second?
So he doesn't run out and follow me
- like last time? - Yes. I will hold onto him.
Hey, gothy. It's okay. Clay's just going on a little walk.
[Sad meow]
Hush your little tiny pussy hairs. He'll be right back.
See? He's right there.
[Meows]
Oh, wait, now it appears that he is in fact gone.
Meow?
He is out of our sight.
[Meows]
I'm gonna be completely honest with you, Gothfield.
Clay is now entirely out of sight.
Now, the universe is made up
only of our two souls, Gothfield.
We are alone. [Meows]
But you'll never leave me.
[Strangled meow]
Perhaps it would be for the best if we prepare
poisoned applesauce... [struggling meows]
and eat it, so to end this agony of isolation.
[Frantic meows]
I shall prepare the venomous apple puree.
Perhaps a future civilization will find our bodies
splayed on the floor next to one another.
Like a cat and duck Romeo and Juliet,
we are not meant for this world. [Screeches]
[Door closes]
All right, cool, I'm back. I closed the door. [Meows]
Oh, he likes you. [Purring]
[Baby voice] Oh, yes, you do. Oh, yeah, look at that.
You and me, purr-ever, Gothfield.
Purr-ever.
Ever. Ever. Ever. [Echoes]
Whit: Hey, uh, Clay.
Barf and I are gonna go on a babe hunt tonight
- if you want to come. - Yeah, I can't. I gotta...
I gotta stay home and work on something.
Whit: Clay, throw that thing away, man.
Simmy-Sue and you are over.
Sure, you still have her picture, but you lost touch years ago.
Yeah, Clay, that's just a picture of a girl with some boobies.
Why don't you come out with us?
- Look at some real girl boobies. - Yeah, I don't know.
Okay, well, Clay, if you want,
we're gonna be at Cheeseburger Larry's,
scamming on some babes.
[high-pitch] Thank you for taking the night off
to celebrate our two-year anniversary.
[Normal] So...
what do you want to do on our big night, babe?
I want to go to a big, fancy dinner
like Rebecca did with her boyfriend.
No, I can't right now. I'm broke,
but I can make some fries and pizza.
Oh, that's so romantic. Can there be candles?
Oh, you want candles? I can do that.
[Glasses clink]
[High pitch] This is a really nice anniversary.
I'm so glad that two years ago today
the coolest boy at the water park talked to me.
Yeah, and I'm glad that you wanted to talk to me.
Aw, you're so sweet. You may be the sweetest.
How about we take this party upstairs?
[High pitch] I'm sorry, Clay, but I'm actually on my period.
Okay, well, this was nice.
Yeah, I guess we'll just call it a night and go to bed.
[Snoring]
[Yawns]
[High pitch] Hmm.
Good morning. [Knocking, bangs]
Hey, Clay! Want to go get some breakfast?
[High pitch] I can't...
[Normal voice] Yeah, I can't, I promised Simmy...
uh, I promised someone
that I would go to the furniture store with them.
Oh, well, uh, let's hang tonight then.
[Sighs] Do we have to go to the furniture store today, babe?
[High pitch] Clay, we need to get you a dresser.
You can't keep your clothes in a pile!
Okay! Got it.
No, seriously, Clay. Piles cause wrinkles!
I mean, it's so embarrassing.
Like I have to walk down the street with someone that's wearing wrinkles?
Like who am i? Like, I mean, it makes me sick.
I think I'm gonna throw up just thinking about it.
Eww! Oh, this is so gross!
[Gags] See, I'm gonna throw up now.
Ohh! Ah!
Was Clay just talking to someone up there?
- That's weird, right? - Very weird.
Very weird.
[High pitch] Oh, Clay, I think we should get this stuff too.
But... I thought we were just here to get a dresser.
Why are you talking to me like that?
It really hurts my feelings when you say stuff like that.
It's like... I mean, you're like... you're judging me!
Simmy, not in the store. I don't want to fight here.
Just take it home.
No! We're doing this here! Do you hear me?!
Clay, whoa, whoa. Stand down. [High-pitch squeaks]
Put your hands down, Clay.
I'm gonna have to ask the two of you to leave.
Simmy-Sue, why do you have to do this here?
Dial it down. Take it outside.
Maybe put that picture in your pocket if it's causing you distress.
So my New Year's resolution was actually
to grow another ab. So it's on its way.
Simmy-Sue! This would have never happened if...
What would have never happened?!
That you were yelling at me in the store?!
I wasn't yelling at you! I was telling you to quiet down.
[High pitch] You shoulda quiet down
because now we don't have a dresser!
Now I just remembered about the dresser.
Now we don't have it.
I don't want the dresser anyway.
[Door bangs] Okay! This has got to stop!
[Muffled yelling] Clay! I'm coming in!
[Gagging, grunts]
- Oh, hey, Whit, what's up? - Okay, seriously, dude.
You're talking to a photo!
You don't know about my relationship, man.
I mean, I'm really in love here.
With a photo, Clay! A photo!
She's more than a photo, man! You're acting like a fool!
[Gasps]
- You just said the "f" word. - Oh my.
- He just said the "f"? - That's right, the "f" word.
- No. - And you know what happens
when one of us gets mixed up with a girl
and starts calling his friend the "f" word.
No! No! [Screams]
You get the treatment.
- No no no. No. - Shh.
Just let the treatment work its healing powers.
# He came from somewhere back in her long ago # [music]
# where he can still believe there's a place in her life #
# some day somewhere #
# she will return #
♪ she had a place in his life ♪
# he never made her think twice #
# as he rises to her apology #
♪ anybody else would surely know ♪
Look, it's working.
♪ he's watching her go ♪
# but what a fool believes #
# he sees #
♪ no wise man has the power... ♪
[All laugh]
All: # doo doo doo. #
[Music stops] Oh, thanks, guys.
- Hey, what are friends for? - So are we gonna go look at some
- real boobies tonight, or what? - Probably not.
Yes, we are all actually virgins.
[Coughs]
All right, so let's go to the mall.
[Clay as Simmy] I don't need Clay.
What I'm gonna do... I'm gonna move to New York
and open up an art gallery. Oh, that'd be great.
Yeah, I'm gonna buy a lot of shoes, and...
What's that? Oh, no!
It's garbage! I hate... ahh!
No! It's sticky. Is it a rotten apple core?
Oh, it is. Eww!
[Groans]
I think I'm gonna throw up. Oh, no! [Gags]
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~