Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen www.addic7ed.com
Hey, Penelope, how'd you like the gift I left you in your locker?
1,000 crickets, not bad, eh?
Didn't even notice.
[Cricket chirps]
Anyway, the better question is do you own an umbrella?
Why would I need an umbrella?
Birdseed?
That all you got?
[Scoffs] I expected more from my arch-Nemesis.
Wordham, begin phase two.
Oh, no.
I hope an adorable little blue Jay doesn't fly in and sit on my shoulder.
[Bird screeches]
That doesn't sound like a blue Jay.
[Raven screeching]
Fly, my pretty. Fly!
[Screams]
In all my years as principal, I have never witnessed such carnage.
This is child's play compared to the wrath that I'm going to bring upon you.
She's not possessed by the devil, we had her tested.
Tomorrow night is the school's international festival,
and I will tolerate no trouble.
It's the only time I can wear lederhosen and clogs and still be taken seriously.
Revenge will be mine.
Frankie, are you even listening or just thinking of ways to get even?
When did you get here?
That's it... this feud with Penelope is over.
If you do anything more to her,
I will ground you for a month and take away big gert.
[Gasps] You wouldn't.
Big Gert is her favorite mannequin head.
It sounds weird, but it's like her Teddy bear, only it's a severed head, so it's...
I'm a good mother.
Putting that aside, I trust this matter has been resolved.
- Ms. Hathaway. - Butler.
Wordham, since my feud with Francesca is over
and I got in the last prank, that must mean I won.
[Laughs] [Clapping]
Congrats, milady.
Permission to sneer while exiting.
- Granted. - [Scoffs]
This isn't over.
Frankie will rise again!
[Bird screeches]
Well played.
[Spooky rock music]
♪ If you move into a haunted house ♪
♪ You gotta try to work things out ♪
♪ So if you're living with a ghost or three ♪
♪ You gotta be one big, semi-scary family ♪
♪ Don't know how we ended up this way ♪
♪ But I guess you could call us ♪
♪ The haunted Hathaways ♪
♪
♪ The haunted Hathaways ♪
♪
In class today, someone hid our teacher's glasses.
That's funny.
In ghost school, someone hid our teacher's arm.
Up top, Miles.
- Nice arm, Louie. - Thank you.
[Gasps] [Southern accent] Oh.
There's my little sugar lump.
Ooh, and, Miles, ain't you just as cute as a bug's ear!
[Giggles]
Did you fall in the shower again?
[Normal voice] No, I'm taking a Louisiana lingo class,
so I can converse better with some of our local customers.
Are you sure?
The locals might think you're making fun of them.
[Southern accent] Oh, hornswoggle, craw daddy, why would they ever think that?
No reason.
[Normal voice] So, Taylor, while I'm taking these classes,
I'd like you to close the bakery for me.
Me? By myself?
You're ready for more responsibility.
And if you do a good job, we can talk about bumping up that curfew.
[Gasps] Really? My curfew?
If all goes well.
Now remember, no fooling around.
I need to know I can trust you.
Starting now.
Ooh, today?
I sort of had plans with my friends.
You know what? No worries.
I'll make it work.
Our little girl's growing up.
[Southern accent] Okay, well, Taylor, you are a fine young tadpole
gone and made a mama frog real proud.
[Normal voice] You know what I'm saying?
I do not.
It's great your mom trusts you.
Come on, Miles. I'm totally responsible.
Why wouldn't she trust me?
[Dance music]
[Both laugh]
Who knew the bakery could be so fun?
What is going on here?
Taylor, a word please.
No, thank you.
Nice moves.
Okay, what are you doing? Michelle said no fooling around.
Miles, everything's fine.
The register's balanced, and I can clean up after they're gone.
Come on. Loosen up.
Let's see some of those moves.
No, this is completely...
Okay, one move.
[Whooping]
Wait, no.
Taylor, you're in charge. Do you know what that means?
[Sighs] I do.
I can hang out with my friends here every day.
Sophie, Susan, same time tomorrow?
Awesome. Can we bring a few people?
I don't see why not.
How? How don't you see?
Relax, I can handle this.
I can clean.
I can dance.
I can clean while I dance.
[Gasps]
That'll buff right out.
Ha ha, that's it, Louie! Five goo balls in a row.
You were right, I just needed to practice.
I'm glad you didn't let me quit after the first hundred tries.
Me too, son. [Laughs]
Phew.
I like what I see, though.
You are definitely going to ace that level two ghost test tomorrow night.
Oh, finally.
Finally.
Well, I'm heading out to poker night.
Or should I call it brag-about-my-son night?
[Laughs] Level two.
[Laughs]
♪ I'm gettin' on my boo, 'cause I'm hittin' level two ♪
♪ All the ghosts in the house say Louie ♪
Louie, Louie...
Don't worry, I'm too depressed to make fun of you.
Wow, what's going on?
Penelope pranked me, and mom says she'll ground me
and take big gert away if I try to get back at her.
But how do I exist in a world where Penelope got me last?
I might have an idea...
That'll never work.
Wait, I should let you get it out first.
While your hands are tied, nobody said I couldn't get back at Penelope.
Hmm, that's true.
You can get her while I stand far away.
No one can blame me.
Okay, so...
Tomorrow at 4:00, everyone will be in the cafeteria setting up
for the international festival.
Perfect time and place.
Penelope's bringing in a pot of moose stew for her Canadian booth.
You bring in a matching pot.
Then, while I create a diversion, you...
Oversalt her stew. Brilliant!
No, you pop in and switch my pot with Penelope's.
So when she goes to open it, it will...
Be oversalted.
[Sighs] No.
Explode in a huge, disgusting mess.
It's perfect.
And it's actually within your narrow skill level.
That it is.
Rise and shine!
[Screams]
Oh, good, you're up.
I need you in the zone today if we're taking down Penelope.
I live in the zone.
Nothing can keep me from that library at 3:00.
The cafeteria at 4:00?
Exactly, I'll be there. I promise.
Hey, Frankie.
Have a great day at school.
Oh, it's going to be the greatest day ever.
[Chuckles]
Why does it sound bad when she says it?
Hey, Louie, you know what's the most important part
of becoming a level two ghost?
The perfect suit. We're going shopping!
Awesome!
Yep, it's a time-honored tradition for a young ghost
to look sharp on the night he's moving up a level.
You ready?
I'm always ready to look good.
Or should I say "gooder"?
[Chuckles]
No, you shouldn't.
It looks great in here.
That's an odd place for a gigantic clock.
Nope, not gonna interfere. Trust you.
Of course you do. We're good people.
I'll see you tonight after Frankie's festival.
You got it, Miles and I will take care of everything.
Yeah, just us. Only us.
You know what, you just need to calm down with all the questions.
Anyway, as they say in the bayou, etouffee beignet lagasse.
Now you're lucky I can stay so cool under pressure.
You were a rock.
Don't worry, it's just a few girls coming over for gossip and snacks.
It's all good.
Hey, Taylor, we're here.
Wow, that's a lot of pizza.
What did you do, invite the whole school?
- Hope that's okay. - Okay?
She said okay!
[Dance music]
[Shouts] My floor!
Taylor, you've gotta stop this before it gets out of control.
You're overreacting.
Nothing's going to get out of control.
Hey, bro! Go deep!
Faster, wordham, this thing starts in three hours.
Hey, everyone, look at my real maple tree from Canada.
Father had it ripped from the earth and flown in for me.
4:00, okay, Louie, do your thing, buddy.
Hey, everybody.
The kid with the India booth has a real tiger outside.
Check it out.
Louie, I'm gonna need some sunglasses, 'cause your star is shining too bright.
[Laughs] Ow!
Oh, wait, I totally forgot!
I look really good in a top hat.
Boom, boom. [Chuckles]
Sorry, no tiger.
Just a hairy man in a striped shirt.
Hey, principal Nelson, how about a time-stamped selfie of the two of us?
Highly unusual, but...
[Camera shutter clicks]
Send me a copy.
Hey, Penelope, take the lid off that pot
and give everyone a whiff of that amazing stew.
Why didn't that work?
Louie!
That's one fine-looking, soon-to-be level two ghost.
[Chuckles]
Hello, Louie.
Uh-oh.
If it makes you feel any better, I got a new suit.
It does not.
How I feel is, the one person I thought I could count on
wasn't there for me when I need him most.
In my defense, I haven't shown you my new hat.
Do you know how many times I've had your back?
862.
I counted on my wet, gushy walk home.
Maybe we could get back at her now.
There is no "we." You let me down.
And since I can't count on you, I have to get Penelope myself,
which means losing the only real friend I have... big Gert.
How can a man who looks so good feel so bad?
[Dance music]
♪
I'm sorry, this is madness.
When did Graham crackers and a quiet board game go out of style?
Tay, this party is gonna be the talk of school tomorrow.
I know, this is so great.
This is so awful. My mom's gonna freak.
Forget a later curfew, I'm never leaving the house again.
You have to put an end to this.
I know, but how?
If I shut this down, I'll be labeled the school buzzkill.
Okay, I think you're being a tad overdramatic.
Hey, I got it. You could be the bad guy.
You're a ghost.
Hmm, I don't care for labels.
Will you focus?
What I'm saying is you could scare them out of here.
Mm, normally I wouldn't scare anyone, but I've had it.
That floor did not wax itself.
Strobe lights? Awesome.
[All cheering]
Got anything scarier?
Scarier?
I was already haunting outside my comfort zone.
Well, I guess I just have to go out there and tell them the party's over.
I have a pen pal in Guam.
She'll still talk to me.
Listen up, everybody!
I have an announcement.
All: Taylor! Taylor! Taylor! Taylor! Taylor! Taylor!
Guys, I'm serious.
I just wanted to say...
Crank up the music!
[All cheering]
All right, this is it.
You are going to ace that level two exam.
[Laughs]
Why are you so distracted?
I'm just thinking about Frankie.
Mm, no one would be more proud of you than Frankie.
She's your best bud, so stop worrying.
You studied hard.
You know what to do. [Chuckles]
You're right, Dad.
I do know what to do.
[Grunts] [Screams]
Louie!
Sorry, pops, but I've gotta go help a friend.
Okay, new plan.
I don't stop the party.
Everyone still thinks I'm awesome.
And that's all I got.
So we're just gonna wait until your mom comes home and goes nuts?
Or what if we don't wait?
What if you make yourself into an illusion of my mom and yell at everyone to go home?
More lies?
I will not take part in any more deception.
[Metal clangs]
Someone just dropped an entire pizza on your floor.
This ends now.
But the fact that peer pressure
kept you from kicking those kids out yourself,
well, I am very disappointed.
Wow, you're already my mom, and you haven't even changed yet.
Watch your tone, young lady.
Is this outfit too matchy-matchy?
You know what? Never mind. Ugh.
Pipe down, you reckless hooligans!
A mature woman is here, and you're gonna listen to me.
[Music stops]
Yes.
[Music starts again]
All: Mrs. H! Mrs. H! Mrs. H!
Free pies and drinks for everyone!
[All cheering]
I didn't know your mom was so cool.
Nobody did.
Can I have a word with you, mother?
Let me just give Zoe my number, so we can facechat later.
Now.
What was that?
Now I understand the pressure.
Hearing "Mrs. H" chanted by all those kids
made me feel like the coolest dude in the room.
[Sighs] It's fine. It's my mess.
I have to end this party no matter what they think of me.
Okay, listen up. This party is over.
[All groaning]
Really?
You guys came over and took advantage of my family's bakery.
Look at this place.
There's a sneaker in the iced tea.
What is that about?
It's time for everyone to go.
I know, I'm a big party pooper.
No, you were right. We took advantage of you.
We feel terrible.
Sorry about the sneaker.
I was working on my jump shot.
Hey, sorry for such a mess.
Maybe you can let us come back, you know, during business hours sometime.
Yes, of course.
Thanks, everyone, for understanding.
I'm proud of you, Taylor.
You did the right thing.
Thanks.
You know, I could really use a hand cleaning up.
Ooh, I'd love to, but Zoe and I have plans to make b.F.F. Mugs at the pottery shop.
Welcome, one and all, to our international festival.
It's been almost 30 hours, and you haven't done anything horrific to Penelope.
Couldn't be more proud.
- Hold on to that feeling. - [Gasps]
The Italian booth has garlic knots.
I'll be right back.
Now remember, if it all goes wrong, we meet up at the safe house.
[Mice squeak]
Frankie, wait.
Louie, what are you doing here?
You're supposed to be at your big ghost test.
No, I'm supposed to be here with my friend.
Now step aside. I got this.
[Gasps]
Louie, stop! What are you doing?
[Grunts] Trust me.
Look at Francesca.
She must be representing the Republic of Dorkistan.
[Both laugh]
What did I say about continuing this feud?
You have ruined this respectable event and interrupted my clog dance.
Way to go, Louie.
Wait for it.
You are in big trouble, miss Pritchard.
Both: What?
Your syrup, your laughing... You are obviously behind this.
You mean you did all that on purpose?
- Pretty smart, huh? - Genius.
I thought Penelope and I had a truce.
I was blindsided.
Woe is me. I may never trust again.
[Mouth full] Oh, my poor baby.
I demand justice.
And some dipping sauce.
Miss Pritchard, you have represented the country of Canada very poorly.
You will be cleaning this cafeteria for a month.
Whatever.
With no help from servants.
No!
Jackpot!
Can you believe what that monster did to me?
Oh, save it, sister. I can see Louie, remember?
- Oh, right. - Mm-hmm.
And you're grounded for a month, during which time you'll have to sleep
without your mannequin head.
I'm actually being a great parent.
I can't believe you missed your test to help me.
I wanted you to know that you can count on me when you need to.
You may still be a level one ghost, but you're a level ten friend.
I think I left something in ghost world.
[All giggling] Hey, Mrs. H. Coolest mom ever right here.
Both: Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
What have I been telling you?
You are pretty cool.
Mm, not only cool, observant too.
You're fixing that hole behind the clock.
You don't miss a thing, do you?
No, I don't.
You missed your test, young man.
But Frankie told me why.
I have to say, choosing loyalty to a friend
over your standing as a ghost is very honorable.
Thanks, dad. The only thing that could have
made it better is if I was wearing my top hat.
I'm wearing a pickle, aren't I?