This is way too much fun for a first date.
We should talk a little, just so later on, we can say we did.
Yeah. Okay.
Um, so what do you want to talk about?
Well, why don't you tell me something interesting
about yourself. And I already know you live
in a doorman building, so... that's
a big check for you.
Okay, uh, let's see.
Uh, I'm a partner at Gibson Dunn.
- Oh, another check. - Mmm.
And I can tie a cherry stem into a knot with my tongue.
How you gonna top that?
I have a daughter named Molly.
Are you okay?
So you faked a seizure?
I had to get out of there.
What am I gonna do, date a guy with a kid?
It was the only way.
☯Synced & Corrected by Seppuku17☯ ❃www.addic7ed.com❃
He was attractive, smart, successful.
The total package. But...
he's dead to me now, so...
what are you gonna do?
Well, I don't get it. What's the problem?
The problem is I don't do dads.
Yeah, we know. You don't do dads,
you don't do guys with loafers, you don't do chiropractors.
Hey,
if wearing a white coat made you a doctor,
I'd be getting a pelvic exam from my butcher.
You know, Kate, if this guy's divorced,
it's not like he has the kid all the time.
That's true.
Maybe he doesn't see the kid at all.
Maybe he's a terrible father.
Fingers crossed.
All right, I'm gonna give him another chance.
We signed the lease on the new house.
We got it!
- All right! - Congratulations! - Wow!
It has tons of natural light,
ocean breeze, plenty of extra space.
- It's perfect. - Great.
Maybe now we can all start hanging out at your place.
All right, just call first.
- We... are naked a lot. - Yeah.
Remind me to put paper down next time I sit on your couch.
Well, if you guys need furniture,
you can have the red armoire upstairs.
You mean the red armoire we all pitched in and bought you
as a wedding gift?
You hate it, don't you?
No... Well, let's just say that...
one of us loves it and one of us hates it,
but I won't say who.
Okay, Maddie Jane is 12 minutes past her nap
so we have to skadoodle. But are we clear
on who's bringing
what to the Mommy and Me potluck?
Yes. Think so.
And remember, nut-free, sugar-free,
gluten-free, dairy-free!
That Maddie Jane is so gonna end up on a stripper pole.
Hey, will I see you tomorrow?
Rachel's working, so I'll be taking Bethany
to toddler hip-hop. Oh, we will be there
poppin' and lockin'.
- Oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. - What?
Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh-oh!
Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.
All right. I'll see you tomorrow.
Okay.
You naughty girl.
You got yourself a little flirting buddy, do you?
What? No.
He wasn't flirting.
Come on, Andi... that arm touch?
And the... uh, uh, uh, uh, uh-oh!
He fancies you.
Lowell...
What are you even...
Don't be silly, you... silly.
I really think he was flirting with you.
Get out of here.
No, I'm telling you, Andi.
No way.
Andi, it looked like it to me.
- Shut up. - Okay.
No, no, no. Where are you going?
We're in the middle of a conversation.
So, how are you feeling?
Oh, you know how it is with those rogue seizures.
They just come and go with no real medical explanation.
You know, I couldn't help but notice
it coincided with me mentioning my daughter Molly.
Look, I had a seizure
and that part of our history isn't gonna change.
But the truth is, I... had a really great time
the other night and I'm getting on board with the idea
that you have one. It.
Her. Uh, Polly.
- Molly. - Yeah, Molly. Molly, yeah.
Can't wait to meet her.
Well, you can meet her right now. She just got back
from her mom's. Hey, Molly?
What? Here? Oh, no. I don't have anything for her. Yeah.
Um, would she like No.
Some lip gloss to play with?
Or a Xanax to suck on?
H-Here she is.
Hi.
I'm Molly.
Well...
aren't you a big girl.
So silly.
What?
Oh, it's nothing.
Something Lowell said earlier.
What'd he say?
Never mind. It's totally ridiculous.
Not even worth mentioning.
Okay.
Fine, I'll tell you.
Okay. So, Lowell thinks that this dad
from Charlie's playgroup was flirting with me.
I mean, look at me.
Isn't that just so crazy?
That is crazy.
It's not that crazy.
I'm sorry. I-Is it just totally unbelievable
that someone would find me attractive?
No, you're beautiful.
But you just said yourself that you don't,
right now, have your usual curb appeal.
“Curb appeal”?
There's a phrase I instantly regret.
Hey, guys.
I want you to meet Kenneth's daughter,
Molly.
- Hey. - Hey, how are you? - Hi. This place
is tragically hip, and I love it.
I'm totally Instagramming this.
She's so cool. She Instagrams everything.
Anyway, we just went shopping and I bought the new iPhone.
And since you are the last person in the world
who still uses a flip phone,
I thought I would give my old one to you.
Oh, I don't know. I'm a bit wary of all this new technology.
No, honey, take it. We can FaceTime.
But we're having face time right now.
Plus,
look, there's nothing wrong with my phone.
It's fine.
Oh, my God, like in the olden times.
Okay, perhaps it's time for an upgrade.
Isn't this amazing? I meet a great new guy,
I get a cool new friend. I mean, could it get any better?
Want to go to Barneys?
I work there... we get a discount.
Does anyone else hear angels singing?
Let's go. Nice to meet you guys.
- Hey, Will. - Hi.
Hey.
Hi.
I'm Molly.
Uh, Will Stokes.
Dr. Will Stokes.
Local doctor.
No.
Perfect.
There's a DVD wedged in here.
Wonder what this is.
Guys, look at that.
I burned 180 calories moving that.
You know what that means.
I've earned myself a cold beer.
That's quite refreshing. It's nice.
Isn't it amazing that a phone can do all this?
Yeah, it was amazing.
In 2007.
You guys, look, it's Andi and Bobby's honeymoon.
Look at them, so young and happy.
Boy, that kid really has done a number on 'em.
Bob's on a jet ski. Hey, Bob!
He's waving and I'm waving back.
Wow, nice hotel suite.
Look at that. They got a kitchen, four-poster bed...
- And Andi naked. - Oh!
Sex tape!
This is a sex tape!
Oh, Bob, go easy on her, mate.
That's the mother of your children.
What the hell kind of position are they getting into now?
Whoa.
She got that move from me sophomore year.
This was obviously intended for a very different audience.
We cannot watch this.
We cannot watch this again!
Hmm.
That is an unfortunate position to pause in.
You know, for such a compact man,
Bob has incredible upper body strength.
Okay. Listen, we cannot let them know
that we've watched this, all right?
Otherwise it's gonna be very awkward for everybody forever.
Surprise!
Came to see the new place!
Oh, my God, it's them.
What do we... what do we... what do we do?
Everyone, stay calm.
We are only as strong as our weakest link.
Right.
Why are you looking at me?
Oh, just act natural.
What is that?
You look like a cowboy in a musical.
I'm sorry. I can't help it, all right?
I'm nervous.
Everything they say and do is gonna remind me
of what we just saw.
TV's on. TV's on.
Oh! I got it. I-I got...
Hurry up!
We're waiting!
Oh... Wow.
It's beautiful.
- Cute place. - What happened to the TV?
Oh,
it doesn't matter.
Will's gonna buy us a new one.
Well, anyway, I know that we said we couldn't make it,
- but, uh, Bobby got off. - So we both came.
Look at these floors.
- Oh, I love hardwood. - Yeah.
She's not kidding.
If it were up to her, she'd put hard wood in everywhere.
Well, anyway, celebrate, right?
- Let's pop this bad boy. - Yeah.
Okay.
Oh. Oh. Ooh..
Hey. Oh.
Honey, I'm sorry.
I fizzed all over you.
I have to move my car.
It's Tom, the flirting dad.
Do I look okay?
Mm, you're underdressed for an e-mail,
but okay for a phone call.
Okay.
Hi, Tom.
Hey, Andi. Listen,
I'm supposed to host Mommy and Me next week, but...
Bethany, don't put that in your mouth!
Uh, but I was wondering
if maybe we could do it at your house instead?
Uh, sure, but I thought that Rachel wanted to host it.
Yeah, that's just it.
Rachel and I are kind of, uh...
We're splitting up.
He and his wife are splitting up.
- No! - Yes!
I am so sorry to hear that, Tom.
It's okay. It's okay. It's for the best.
Anyway, I was wondering if maybe I could get,
like, five minutes alone with you tomorrow,
'cause there's something I want to talk to you about,
but right now, Bethany is getting in the oven,
so I should probably deal with that.
Oh, my God, he wants to talk to me about something.
So? It's not like you've never talked before.
Yeah, but before, he had a spouse.
It was all innocent.
Now that they're splitting up, the game has changed.
You don't think he's leaving his wife for me, do you?
Maybe he's a chubby chaser.
That's for me.
I have a date.
A date?
Ooh, interesting.
I want to be the first to see what's wrong with this one.
Hi, Kate.
No!
It is 2:00 in the morning.
Where have you been?
Okay, a much bigger question is, what are you doing here?
What happened? I heard a woman scream.
Kate, why are you here?
Mind your own business.
How did you get to Molly?
She got to me. Found me online.
Well, you absolutely cannot date her.
Well, why not?
We danced, we made out. I mean...
What is that smell?
It's a diaper full of poo.
But go on about making out with a 23-year-old.
He's not gonna be making out with her anymore.
Why? You guys getting married?
Look, Kate, in case you haven't noticed,
it hasn't exactly been easy for me to meet women.
It's true.
The most action he gets is squeezing into his bike shorts.
I don't care, okay?
I really like her dad, and we cannot
date a father/daughter combo!
That is also true.
Because if it works out for you,
and it works out for her, that would make her your...
Exactly! You cannot see her again!
Come on.
I don't want to have the kind of mother-in-law relationship
where we bicker all the time.
That is not funny.
It is. It's a little funny.
Listen, all joking aside,
I promise we will never put you in a home.
Stop it!
Right. But when your eyes go, we are taking your car keys.
That's just safety.
Do me a favor. Will you get rid of this on your way out for me?
Andi. Hey.
I'm so glad you're here.
Yes, I'm sure you are.
Listen, you need to rethink your separation with Rachel.
There's nothing to rethink. I know what I want.
Oh, Tom, Tom... sweet, foolish Tom.
You can't have what you want.
Why not?
Because... I love my husband.
Cool. What's that got to do with me and Miss Lily?
Miss Lily wha-huh?
I was wondering if you could find out if she's single.
I really like her.
She seems smart.
Yeah, that makes sense.
- Kate! - Hi.
Hey.
Oh, you smell great.
Tip of the iceberg.
I brought red.
Hope that's okay.
That sounds fantastic!
What are you doing here?
Well, I came to pick up Molly for our date,
and Ken graciously invited me to stay for dinner.
Yeah, I just figured the more the merrier.
- Molly speaks very highly of Will. - Oh.
Hear that, Mother?
She speaks highly of me.
You are only doing this to mess with me.
I would never date somebody to mess with you.
That's just a huge bonus.
All right, come on, birdie.
Get that piggy.
Sweetie?
- Sweetie? - Mm-hmm.
- Okay. - Oh.
It feels like ever since you got that phone,
you've had no time for me.
Mm. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just, shh!
Do you mind if maybe we just talk?
What?
Oh, absolutely, yeah.
Um, absolutely.
It's a FaceTime request.
- From you. - Yeah.
Go in the other room so that we can talk.
Go! Go!
Babe, flip the camera so I can see what you're seeing.
Can you see this?
Why are you unbuttoning your shirt?
Because Bobby and Andi aren't the only ones
who can have fun on film.
Will, that was hysterical.
He's a doctor, and he's funny.
Prognosis, boyfriend.
Medical humor.
I love it, Ken.
Brainwave, we should all go away together. This weekend.
I... love... that.
Mother?
Oh...
That is it!
A word, please?
Uh, osteoporosis?
What are you doing out there?
Apparently, preparing to bang a 23-year-old
with the father's blessing.
- Oh, God. - Will you just cut it out,
- and break up with her? - No.
No way. I think I could actually get serious with her.
Well, I think I could actually get serious with him!
See what you did? You woke the baby!
Oh, what baby?
Yeah, what baby?
Oh. There's my little guy.
Don't cry.
Oh.
Who's this?
I was gonna tell you tonight.
This is my son Spencer.
Oh. What a cutie.
That would make you a father.
That would make you a grandmother.
Excuse me.
Does this window open to the street?
So, she faked another seizure?
Uh-huh.
Even bit my hand so it would seem real.
Hey, Lowell.
Enjoying my old iPhone?
- Yeah, I am! - I know you are.
Because it's still syncing wirelessly to my iPad.
Oh, no.
What? What-What's happening?
It means she's seen everything you've put on your phone.
Everything.
But that means she's seen...
Pretty people having sex.
Seriously?
You guys made a sex tape after what we just watched?
What did you just watch?
A video of a...
I can't think of anything! We saw your sex tape.
You couldn't say “cat”?
Half the internet is videos of cats, Will.
You watched our sex tape?!
Not just me. We all did.
Oh.
Wow.
Remind me never to rob a bank with you.
Okay. In our defense, you left it in the armoire.
That's where I put it.
How could you guys do that?!
Listen, if it's any consolation,
your sex tape is way better than their sex tape.
No, it's not any consolation...
- Really? - Really?
Go, younger Bobby.
Take it, younger Andi.
This is kinda turning me on.
I'm thinking that maybe we should...
If you're gonna say anything other than have a snack,
the answer is no.
☯Synced & Corrected by Seppuku17☯ ❃www.addic7ed.com❃