[Julia] It's such bullshit that I can't be in the house.
He seemed so laid-back about everything,
but now that he's found out I'm seeing someone,
he's acting as though his masculinity has been injured.
Right now, with Fausto, I feel as strongly as I did
in those first few years with Ruy.
You shouldn't feel guilty about the bullshit, Refugio.
I'm Luli, Mom, your daughter.
[scoffs] My daughter?
Uh-huh.
Don't fuck with me, you wish!
Men are all animals.
That's why I'm never getting hitched.
I'll stick to guys who want to give me pleasure.
Hey...
Hm?
Ever have a really good fuck?
[grunts]
Not me.
Don't believe so.
No, I've never had a really good fuck.
I don't know.
A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES
[theme music playing]
- [woman] I've already showered you. - What's the matter with you?
You don't shower me, I shower myself!
[woman 1] Why are you...?
[woman 2] I shower myself every day, for your information.
- [woman 1] We've already showered. - I'm not showering with you!
You have your own shower.
- I'm getting fed up with you! - [phone ringing]
- Leave me alone! - It's about to rain.
Please, all of you...
[nurse jiggling door handle] No! You locked it. Pachi.
Julia?
Coming.
[phone ringing]
Come on, answer, god damn it.
For fuck's sake, will you pick the phone up?
Motherfucker!
Fucking goddamn hell!
[groans]
Put the lid on it.
I'll help you.
Don't be stupid.
Tell me the truth.
Did you know she was seeing someone?
Maybe it's time you realize that it's over.
So, who is it?
Andrea's dentist, Julia's cousin's ex.
Which cousin?
This bitch I can't stand, the awful woman, María Cristina.
Unbelievable bitch.
You know what stings the most?
she used her mom's illness to deceive us.
Seriously, Ruy? You shouldn't joke about that stuff.
No, it's no joke. I'm telling the truth.
"Saturday at Grandma's" is a lie, Idalia.
She was seeing that fucker.
Well if that's true, if she used her mother as a cover,
she might have crossed the line.
Of course she crossed the line, for fuck's sake!
All because she was horny!
She ruined her cousin's life, and she ruined ours!
Now wait, don't involve me in any of this! I'm not her husband.
[Andrea] Cacho, my breakfast!
If Cachito hears about this, it's over.
I washed her pants. They were filthy.
- She needs clean clothes for school. - I know, I know.
I won't be home for lunch.
Will you pick her up from school?
Thanks, I'll bring her her smoothie.
I'm swamped at work. I'm so fucked.
[muttering] What work?
Slacker.
[clucking]
[water sloshing]
Ortiburcio!
Bawk, bawk-bawk!
[Idalia] Cachito, what are you doing up here? You're gonna be late.
Go on downstairs. I'll be with you in a second.
[Andrea] Mm-hmm.
THE E-MAIL PUBLICITY THAT PAVES YOUR WAY
JULIA PÉREZ
FAUSTO
YOU WERE TOO TIRED, LOVE
[Idalia] Wait up, Cachito!
[clattering]
Don't run down the stairs. Give me your hand.
Okay.
- Ow! - [Ruy] Oh, I'm sorry!
I'll try to be gentle.
Is Mommy coming back to take me to "tapoeica"?
- Capoeira. - Capoeira!
No.
[Andrea] Is it because you had a fight?
No, she went to see your grandma.
But listen, don't worry about any of that, okay?
Mommy didn't used to visit Grandma much, did she?
[Ruy grunting]
But now that Grandma's sick in her mind, Mommy goes a lot.
Well, that is because... she wants to be with her.
Right?
Your grandma is getting old.
You know, right now I'm still a good-looking guy,
but one day I'll be old too. We'll all be old one day.
And when I turn into an old geezer...
you will take care of me.
I could be a grump.
If you're grumpy, I won't take care of you.
But I will if you're nice.
Well, in that case,
I won't be grumpy.
- Deal? - Deal.
Great. It's a deal.
[Julia] It's dangerous for her to wander out at night.
Yes, but that sort of thing will become more frequent.
It's all part of the brain deterioration.
Loss of modesty is also very common.
[Julia] Does she talk to you about sex?
- Yes, all the time. - I don't want her alone at night.
Don't worry, I can find someone to take the night shift.
Okay, call if anything happens, please.
- Mm-hmm. I made a sandwich for you. - Thank you.
[phone buzzing]
Hello?
What's up?
Fine.
Yeah, sort of, I guess.
Yeah, I'm heading to the studio.
I really don't wanna run into Ruy,
and my mother's not doing very well.
I'll tell you later, okay?
Bye.
- [Ruy] Good morning, Ms. Luz. Excuse us. - [Ms. Luz] Good morning.
Why do grownups wash things if they'll just get dirty again?
Come here, cachito. Here we are.
She's wasting all that water.
I'm going to tell on her.
[Ruy] Are there rocks in your bag?
It's so heavy. Why is it so heavy?
- Because... - Your lunch!
[Ruy groans]
You can have anything you like.
Hi, Güero.
Julia, stop ignoring me. We need to talk.
- Néstor! - What's up, neighbor?
- [Ruy] I need something for Andrea's lunch. - Uh, look in the basket.
No, these are all turkey sandwiches.
I have egg, organic.
Not like the eggs made from robot chickens, right?
- Néstor, are those worms? - No, dear. Those are pork rinds.
- Are those vegan? - Let's go.
Sure. Hey!
I forgot my wallet. I'll come pay you later!
There's soup and frozen ravioli.
- Here's your Americano. - Thank you.
Will you tell Andrea she's not going to capoeira?
Please pamper her and give her everything she wants.
- And your muffin. - Thank you.
Also, could you please pull the big suitcase out of storage?
Ruy is moving out today.
Appreciate it, Idalia.
That will be 87 pesos, please.
- Sure, hold on... - I got it.
What are you doing here? Just a second, I'll be right back.
- [server] No problem. - I've been following you. I have a plan.
[purring]
The kids who missed my party can sign up here.
I'll bring more chairs tomorrow.
[gasps] Who got the bear?
Me.
Here.
Juanita was for you.
- Bring money tomorrow, okay? - [boy] How much?
Depends on how long.
But no more than one week.
Here. Dulce's yours.
- Caro, this one's for you. - Thank you.
Who got the coffee maker?
[school bell ringing]
Come on, come on. Go.
[phone ringing]
[Fausto] Your breakfast, ma'am.
Don't call me that, you moron.
You will get cavities and you'll lose all of your patients.
What the hell? That's harsh.
[kisses] Come on, let's go have breakfast in the adult area.
[giggling] Okay.
[phone ringing]
[Fausto] Don't you wanna get that?
[Julia] No.
[phone continues ringing]
[woman] I hate my fucking life. I'm sick of this.
[woman 2] It's really not such a big hassle.
We're lucky to have live updates every day by the president.
Can you believe these people? Idiots!
Why don't you go into showbiz?
- Hey, Ruy. - Hey, Laura.
Get a load of her.
She should try getting up at five o'clock.
Maybe you should both just drop it.
What's up?
I wanna make something totally clear, okay?
You made me really uncomfortable at the party, as usual.
I want you to stop, okay?
What?
[man] Now with what's going on in Italy, I mean, this is not good.
[classical music playing on stereo]
[Idalia] Cachito?
Let's go to the park, okay?
[Andrea] No, thank you.
I gotta finish my catalog for school tomorrow.
You said you didn't have homework. What are you doing?
You swear you won't tell anyone?
All of my friends at school
really like my toys. You know?
So, I decided...
to lend them out for one or two days.
And they'll give me some money for that.
But, if you don't tell anyone,
I might give you some of that money.
Hmm.
In my little village, that's called "renting," not "lending."
But you know what?
I'd rather you were smart than penniless.
[chicken clucking]
[gasps] What's that?
I don't know.
[clucking continues]
Come see.
[whispering] Ortiburcio.
[clucking]
[Andrea clucking]
[Idalia laughing]
This little chick is your child.
Bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk!
Bawk, bawk-bawk!
- He's your son. - [laughing]
What's your favorite color? Brown?
Or... white?
[Andrea and Idalia clucking]
[Idalia] He's a handsome rooster.
He doesn't speak English.
Well, does he speak Spanish, then?
[chuckles] No, he can only speak Rooster.
[Andrea clucking]
Oh! Can you knit him a scarf like the one you made me for Christmas?
I'm sure your parents will want us
to return him to Mrs. Luz's house.
Since they're in a fight, they might not even notice.
You're worried, aren't you, about your parents fighting so much.
Julia, where the hell are you? Why won't you answer? I'm so pissed.
Got that?
- Thank you. - [driver] Thanks, man.
FOR RENT
[woman] Hello?
Hi, there, I live next to you in unit 12,
and I forgot my keys. Would you mind buzzing me in, please?
Lalo, I think there's a burglar downstairs.
No, no, no!
[neighbor] How will you get inside without your keys?
My wife will be here soon. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Thank you.
- Will you call the fire department? - Yeah, sure.
If I smell gas, I'll call them. But don't worry about it.
Listen,
climb through the window.
[elevator dings]
Hm?
[commentator] Look out! Diter takes a shot and... goal!
- Goal! - [crowd cheering]
[Ruy] Thank you. Excuse me.
Good... afternoon.
Sir, I'm sorry...
Uh, excuse me.
Don't you think it's a little high?
[neighbor] Hurry, before my husband notices.
He gets jealous.
Thank you.
Hey...
- You smell anything? - Not yet.
Almost there.
No. No, no.
I don't smell gas. No leak.
[chuckling] No leak. Thanks.
Keep it down from now on, you two, okay?
No one wants to hear all those nasty things you do.
[Julia moaning]
Ruy!
[clattering]
Fausto.
Fausto!
[moaning]
[Fausto moans]
[kissing]
[both chuckling]
[Fausto] Do you wanna have a nap now?
[giggling] No.
[both laughing]
["Broken Boy" by Cage The Elephant plays]
[muttering] Motherfuck!
[groans]
♪ I was born on the wrong side of the train tracks ♪
♪ I was raised with a strap Across my back ♪
♪ Lay me on my side Or hold me up to the light ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ I was burned By the cold kiss of a vampire ♪
♪ I was bit by the whisper Of a soft liar ♪
♪ Any good friend of yours Is a good friend of mine ♪
♪ Broken boy ♪
♪ How does it feel? ♪
♪ Broken boy ♪
♪ How does it feel ♪
No fucking way.
♪ Tell me why I'm forced to live In this skin ♪
♪ I'm an alien, just an alien ♪
[commentator shouting on TV] Now he's shooting...
[banging] Hey!
Um, sir!
- [tank hissing] - [Julia giggling] Okay, let's hear it.
[Fausto] Okay, I'll tell you, but promise not to laugh.
- [Julia] Okay, okay. - Okay, okay.
"The Suicide Cavities."
[both laughing]
Are you serious?
What? It's a great name. I've already ordered the merch.
You're kidding me! No fucking way!
You ordered a bunch of t-shirts and pins for a band that doesn't even exist?
[cackling]
You're a complete moron, Fausto.
But I still love you.
I love you so, so, so, so much.
[kissing]
[both giggling]
Even though you're a moron.
I'm a kids' dentist, of course I'm a moron.
[both laughing]
And my father made that very clear
when he found out I couldn't cut it as an oral surgeon.
When I graduated, he gave me a Rolex.
Wow! What a snob. Then what?
And he told me: "Careful, son,
it's well known that pediatric dentists
have some of the highest suicide rates among dentists."
No!
[both laughing]
And from that day on, I've been addicted to this.
[both laughing]
[mask hissing]
[Fausto inhales deeply]
Do you really give that to children?
Of course not!
Obviously I'd never do that. No, it's for my own enjoyment,
when I need a little recreational alone time.
Aren't you afraid to fry your brain or anything?
Because right now, I really need mine to be solid.
No, on the contrary, it helps you think.
- Really? - Mm-hmm.
[Julia inhales deeply]
Hold it.
Come.
- I think here is good. - [Idalia] Yes.
- Go back. - Okay.
[Ortiburcio clucking]
[doorbell buzzes]
- [giggling] - Run, run, run!
Come on.
[Andrea] Okay.
LOCKSMITH
- Hello, there. How are you? - What can I do for you?
- Good afternoon. - What's up, Luz?
Here, let me take that.
Did you see that? He's changing the lock.
[Fausto] What do you think?
Wanna go on a trip with me sometime?
[Julia] One of these days.
As long as you don't take me to McAllen, where you took my cousin, I'd love to.
No, no, no. She took me.
[laughing]
No, besides, I hate McAllen.
No, I was thinking more along the lines of Puerto.
Nice beaches, walking around naked all day,
having great food.
Sounds lovely.
I don't recall what it's like to have a vacation without a kid.
It's like, whenever we've gone anywhere,
she's always had to have her teddies and her blanket,
because she can't sleep anywhere without them.
Anyway, I can't fit anything into my suitcase
because of her damn teddies.
It's just crazy. Once you have a kid, life stops being about you.
[kisses]
- What? - Nothing.
[Raiza] What's up, pollito? Look, I know you're kinda depressed right now,
but if you wanna drink, and I mean just one, motherfucker,
why don't you drop by our anniversary party?
If you clean yourself up I'll introduce you to someone.
Kisses.
[Ruy scoffs]
[cumbia music playing]
[crowd reacting]
[indistinct chatter]
We'll see.
- Oh, hey there. Julia around? - No.
We don't party without her. Bye.
[man] Joking, bro!
I'll have a whisky, please.
Are you Cameron?
No way! I'm Ruy.
So what's up?
- Nice to finally meet you. - [chuckling] Yeah.
- Raiza talks about you a lot. - Because she feels sorry for me.
I don't think so. She loves you.
She talks about you all the time.
Nah, I'm a complete and total piece of shit.
I see you two have met.
[kissing] Hope you're not too traumatized.
I see you're still spiraling, aren't ya?
- [Ruy] I really fucked up. - Thanks.
What did you do?
- She's been seeing a dentist. - [Raiza] No way!
[Cameron] Those guys are total junkies!
She left me for a fucking preppy dentist.
She hasn't left you. You're just separated.
No, we are separating. Not the same thing at all.
No, dude, you're gonna be fine.
Wait, did you already know she was seeing someone?
No, Ruy, I didn't know anything.
Honestly, I don't get it. Do you get it?
I really need for you to listen to me. I need to talk to someone, understand?
If you wanna talk,
calm down and wait a minute.
Come on, dude.
Give him a glass of water.
No. Another whisky.
Will you tell me how to say "dentist" in French?
Dentiste de merde.
Wait, I get it.
[laughing]
That's fucking good.
It must suck to see your mom in that state.
[Julia] I almost ran her over.
It broke my heart.
Are you sure you don't want to spend the night with me?
No, I have to see what Ruy is up to.
I told him to move out today, he can stay at his mom's.
Wait, what? He's moving out?
Yeah, because before I left for my mother's,
we got in a huge fight again, and he knows about us.
He knows?
It's nothing...
[scoffs] I mean, it's all good.
Uh, but is... Once we have our talk with Andrea, that'll be it.
- You know? It's horrible, but I... - What the hell?
- I feel liberated. - Are you serious?
- What? - What the hell?
You've been here all day,
but you didn't think to tell me about this?
I'm sorry. It slipped my mind. It happened yesterday.
It's what we wanted isn't it?
Not this way. What'll happen to Ruy?
[Julia scoffs]
"What will happen to Ruy?"
What? Are you fucking serious, dude?
Look, if you're scared, we can just end it right now, okay?
[dance music playing]
Dude, how you doing?
Sorry to interrupt.
Uh, listen, Rebe, can we talk for a second?
We did. There's no more to say.
[Ruy] Come on, give me one minute of your time.
- Let's go outside. - Dude, don't touch me, okay?
You're such an asshole, Ruy.
Look, you don't have to overreact. Don't get hysterical.
Hey! She said not to touch her, asshole.
Hang on, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sorry.
It's all good. Good. Again, I'm sorry.
- He's such a dick. - Such a dick.
He should really know better, right?
- He's harassing you all the time. - Right? I mean, what the fuck?
[club music playing]
Bet you wanna smoke, don't you? Huh?
Sure, yeah.
Come on.
You need to get clarity, pollito.
I'm such an asshole.
I spent the whole day pouring salt in the wound.
Look, dude, you both set the ground rules.
You can't just break them because you feel sorry for yourself.
Or because you're jealous, right?
- No, no, no. Of course not. - Seriously.
I know it isn't easy, but you had an agreement,
and you can't just break it, dude.
That's pretty easy for you to say,
because you're on a whole other level.
[chuckling] Oh, please, give me a break.
People think that being in a three-way relationship
is all just crazy hot sex, and...
no commitments, but that's not true at all.
We've had to put more clauses and rules in the relationship
than the fucking constitution, you know?
No one belongs to anyone,
- but we're totally there for each other. - Mm-hmm.
The three of us have to talk about everything.
Yeah, it can be a pain,
but it saves a lot of trouble in the end.
We can't take sides, as in two against one.
Except in bed, of course.
[chuckling] Shit, oh my God.
[all laughing]
But... when one of us feels uncomfortable about it,
we call it quits, no problem.
It's over.
[woman] Hey, guys, what the hell?
What are you doing back here?
[Ruy] Romina.
They're staying.
- Is he wasted? - Yeah.
[kisses]
Don't worry, everything will be fine.
[Ruy] Come on, come on. You can do it, Andrea. That's right.
Julia, come see, please! Quickly!
A few more steps, that's right!
Wow!
[chuckling] Oh, our baby is walking!
Andrea, come here. Come to Daddy. That's right.
Come on, my love. Yes! Good job! You did it!
Julia, did you see...
[sighs]
What the fuck?
[muttering] Well, fuck you.
Motherfucker. Motherfucker.
Fucking asshole.
[shouting] Motherfucker!
[whispering] You goddamn son of a bitch.
- [Ruy] Julia? - You damn bastard! I want a divorce!
["Trash People" by Cherry Glazerr playing]
♪ We wear our underpants Three days in a row ♪
♪ My room smells like an ashtray ♪
♪ Wearing a smile And a heart on my sleeve ♪
♪ Collect your weary mind ♪
♪ Unbend and breathe, unwind ♪
♪ Face the setting sun ♪
♪ There is no time to start over ♪