Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen www.addic7ed.com
Ally: Hey, guys. Guess what I got for us.
It's a chore wheel. (Laughs)
It will be a fun way for us to split up the workload.
Ooh! And I thought chores were fun before.
Come on, we all have to pitch in.
Plus, the mall facilities inspector is visiting all the stores this week.
Everything has to be perfect, or we can get shut down.
Ooh, I'm gonna spin first.
Clean the bathroom? What's my prize?
This one-of-a-kind toilet brush!
Yes!
Guess who booked big-time celebrity guests to come to A&A music factory
to talk and perform for all of our students.
(Panting) Sorry, too many words.
Let me start over.
I just got off the phone with Billie and Bobbie!
Billie and Bobbie from "Billie and Bobbie show"?
They're, like, my favorite performers ever.
Hey!
Sorry, they're my second favorite.
You guys are tied for third.
First is the magician who performed at my family reunion.
He turned my aunt into a dove.
Never did see her again.
Billie and Bobbie are in town to do a live taping of their TV show,
and I asked them to stop by to talk to our students.
I know they're this wholesome family act, but aren't they a little cheesy?
What's cheesy about a brother-sister duo that tells knock-knock jokes
and sings folk songs about friendship, sunshine, and sibling love?
Everything?
But hey, you can't deny how popular Billie and Bobbie are.
Is Billie the brother or the sister?
- Sister. - Brother.
- I thought Billie was the brother. - Isn't Bobbie the brother?
I know how to find out. Let's watch the theme song.
♪ Take a Billie ♪
♪ you add a Bobbie ♪
♪ you get a Billie ♪
♪ and a Bobbie ♪
♪ we're Billie and Bobbie, Bobbie and Billie ♪
♪ "the Billie and Bobbie show." ♪
That clears that up.
(Theme music playing)
♪ When the crowd wants more ♪
♪ I bring on the thunder ♪
♪ 'cause you've got my back ♪
♪ and I'm not going under ♪
♪ you're my point, you're my guard ♪
♪ you're the perfect chord ♪
♪ and I see our names together on every billboard ♪
♪ we're headed for the top, we've got it on lock ♪
♪ we'll make 'em say "hey!" ♪
♪ and we'll keep rockin' ♪
♪ oh, there's no way I could make it without ya ♪
♪ do it without ya, be here without ya ♪
♪ it's no fun when you're doing it solo ♪
♪ with you it's like, "whoa," yeah, and I know ♪
♪ I own this dream ♪
♪ 'cause I got you with me ♪
♪ there's no way I could make it without ya ♪
♪ do it without ya, be here without ya ♪
(Pop music playing)
- ♪ Take a Billie ♪ - ♪ You add a Bobbie ♪
- ♪ but what's a Billie... ♪ - ♪ Without a Bobbie? ♪
- ♪ It's like sweet corn ♪ - ♪ Without a cobbie ♪
- ♪ or a worker ♪ - ♪ Without a jobbie ♪
- ♪ or a hotel ♪ - ♪ Without a lobby ♪
♪ that's why we're Billie and Bobbie, Bobbie and Billie ♪
♪ "the Billie and Bobbie show." ♪
So wait, Billie is the... -Still no clue.
Having fun, Lily?
I can't believe I'm this close to Billie and Bobbie.
Her hair is even bigger in real life.
- Knock-knock. - Who's there?
- Canoe. - Canoe who?
Canoe tell us if there are any Billie and Bobbie fans in the house?
- Hey, sister. - Yeah, brother?
You know what I always wanted?
- My golden curls? - Oh!
No, really, I always wanted a cherry red sports car.
I asked for one for my 16th birthday, but mother wouldn't get it for me.
Oh, well, she got you a cherry red bicycle.
But none of my dates could fit in that basket.
Oh!
I don't know how much more of this I can take.
All this cuteness is making me sick.
Oh, come on. That one was kind of funny.
- Everyone, dance with us. - Come on, get up.
Show us some of your best moves.
This is great. Good job, kids.
- Bye. - Bye now.
- Hello. - Hello there.
Okay, I rolled my eyes so many times today, I'm getting dizzy.
There is no way Billie and Bobbie are that perky in real life.
Hey, Trish. Aren't you just a bundle of sunshine?
Thank you so much for having us here.
(Nervous chuckle) You're welcome.
Well, hey.
We wanted to invite y'all to our live TV show taping
at club-a-dub-dub tomorrow night.
Oh, wow, thanks.
And thank you so much for coming today. It meant a lot to the kids.
Oh, that's why we do what we do...
Both: For the kids.
You guys don't talk like that all the time, do you?
Both: Like what?
Forget it.
Hey, would you two mind showing us around your music school?
Both: Sure, we'd love to.
Oh, great. Now they've got you doing it.
So we have a professional booth for our singers,
- a studio for our dancers... - Wow.
A brand-new snack machine for our eaters.
Ooh, do y'all mind if I grab an apple?
(Camera shutter clicking)
Oh! A rat!
Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, this is so embarrassing.
I'm so sorry, bi... Bob... bi...
Girlfriend.
Someone must have forgotten to clean out the machine.
I did clean it out.
Wow, pretty gross, huh?
You must want to yell or say a bad word.
Oh, no, she just startled me.
Oh. Aww.
We love animals.
Can we keep him?
Uh, sure?
As long as you keep him away from our school.
We have an inspection coming up, and rat infestation...
It will get us shut down.
Oh, well, we wouldn't want that.
Say, what's all this over here?
Our one-of-a-kind instrument carousel.
Well, how neat. Shall we?
And a-one, and a-two...
Both: Gee willikers!
Is that ketchup and mustard?
I don't get it. I just cleaned those.
I have never in my entire life been so completely and utterly...
Here we go.
...amused.
Oh, come on!
Oh, no, really. It just...
It take such a creative mind to think of a prank like this.
Hey, brother, what do you say we hit the food court
and think of a great use for these condiments?
Oh, hey, sister, I think that's a great idea.
- Okay. - We will see you all at the show.
- Girl: Bye. - (Boy chuckles)
This place is a mess.
Well, at least the floors are getting cleaned. Look.
(All exclaim)
Wait, why are there bubbles coming from the bathroom?
(Screams) And why are there more rats coming from the vending machine?
(Screams) And why is there an angry man
with the mall facilities inspector badge standing in the doorway?
(All scream)
What in the world is going on here?
Nothing much.
What in the world is going on here with you?
I'm talking about this mess. This place is a disaster.
And what am I stepping in?
That'll be mustard, sir.
Honey dijon, to be exact.
I know this looks bad, but I promise, we take our jobs here very seriously.
Well, at least some of us take our jobs seriously.
Others leave soap in the sink and forget to turn off the water.
I did turn off the water.
- Or forget to clean the instruments. - I did clean the instruments.
Oh, right, just like Austin cleaned out the vending machine.
- I did, I swear. - Enough.
I'm seeing flooding, filth and an infestation with disgusting rats.
(Gasps) How dare you to talk about the Ratsteins like that?
And yes, I named them the Ratsteins.
Bottom line, this music school is not up to code,
and I have every right to shut it down.
No, no, Mr. Inspector Man, sir.
Can I call you Mr. Inspector Man, sir?
My name's Mr. Schxlumbraugh.
Yeah, I'll stick with "sir."
You're gonna have to give us another chance.
I don't know what's going on around here, but we can fix it, I promise.
Fine, you have 48 hours.
Get this place in shape, or say goodbye to your music school.
Oh, oh.
- Mr. Schlep... - Hey.
Mr. Schlep... Schlepper...
(Gasps)
What is going on in here?
Is someone throwing a bubble party without us?
Uh, I wish.
We're just stuck cleaning up this mess of soap suds.
Oh, well, you seem frowny.
Ooh, I bet a song about bubbles will cheer you up.
I really don't think that's...
♪ Gonna float like a bubble, light and free ♪
♪ don't burst my bubble and me being me. ♪
- Huh, I actually do feel better. - Huh.
Oh, well, how did all of this happen?
Our friend Dez used too much soap cleaning up the bathroom,
and then he left the sink running.
And Trish didn't clean the instruments even though she was supposed to.
Huh. Well, that's a shame.
Here you two are working so hard to make this school shine,
and all those two do is bumble it up.
Excuse my language.
Wait, no, it's not like that. It's...
You know what? Maybe it's time for y'all to rethink your team.
I mean, we think about our team every day.
That's what makes us Bobbie and Billie, like baked beans and chili.
(Gasps) Or chocolate and vanilli.
(Laughing)
(Both sigh)
Well, we're a good team too.
Austin and Ally like...
Milk and a cowie.
Hey, you know what? Why don't you two go out
and enjoy a nice, leisurely meal?
And we will stay here and clean this place up for you.
Oh, no. No, no, we could never ask you to do that.
You guys have a show to rehearse for.
No, we insist. Cleaning is actually one of our favorite things to do.
Oh, let me guess. You guys have a song about it.
Both: Sure do.
♪ Clean out your heart, let the love shine in ♪
♪ put all your troubles in a garbage bin... ♪
(Continue humming)
- Oh. - Well, look at y'all hard at work up here.
Oh, you have no idea.
I've been scrubbing out these instruments for the past 15 minutes.
And I only took two breaks.
Well, you know, it seems to me like you two are
are the real heart and soul of this operation,
you know? And you don't even get your names on the sign.
I don't need my name on the side to tell me how great I am.
I tell that to myself every morning in the mirror.
And I'm sure Austin and Ally tell you how much they appreciate you, too.
Not really.
But you work so hard.
Yeah, I do, don't I?
I clean the bathrooms, teach the music video class,
provide comic relief with my oddball observations.
Well, you know, it is just such a shame
that you two are so undervalued, you know?
I mean, here you are, just working for hours...
Or, like, quarters of hours,
and they are off enjoying a leisurely lunch.
Both: What?
They're supposed to be downstairs, cleaning.
Oh, no. I mean, they left.
I supposed they just didn't really feel the need to pitch in.
That is so strange.
They don't seem like the type who would take all the credit
without doing their fair share of the work.
Oh.
Those sneaks.
Taking credit without doing work is my thing.
Well, you know what makes us feel better
when a couple of egomaniacs take advantage of our friendship
and treat us like dirt?
Please be a song. Please be a song.
- A song. - Yes!
Save it. I prefer to take a more direct approach.
- Let's go, Dez. - Oh.
Goodness.
I'd actually love to hear a song.
♪ We'll stick together like two birds... ♪
- Trish: Dez! - Gotta go.
♪ You get a French fry and add some ketchup... ♪
Please don't.
Well, well, well, look who it is.
Didn't expect to see the two of you here.
You didn't? I thought that's why we came down here.
I can't believe you guys are just relaxing in the mall
while Dez and I do all the work in the music factory.
Yeah, why are you slacking? The school's a mess,
and inspector Schluchsinbruxin's is coming in two days.
Slacking? We've been working non-stop.
And besides, the school wouldn't be a mess
if you guys had done your chores in the first place.
- We did do our chores. - Yeah.
And it's about time you started appreciating us.
We do appreciate you. You guys are a huge part
of the success of the music factory.
We couldn't make it without you!
And we appreciate you!
It's inspiring how much you do for all of our students!
- Well, we love you guys! - Then why are we all yelling?
I have no idea!
Look, I know things have been crazy, but we can't turn on each other.
We have to get everything back in shape
before the inspector comes, or we'll get shut down.
Yeah, and then you'll lose all your students to the b&b music factory.
What's the b&b music factory?
The rival school Billie and Bobbie are opening up.
Gang: What the what?
Lily, what are you talking about?
Well, I'm not sure exactly what's going on,
but I've heard Billie and Bobbie say
they've been sabotaging the A&A music factory
so that the mall inspector would shut it down
their plan is to open up their own school and take all your students away.
So you do know exactly what's going on.
Huh, I guess I do.
I can't believe Billie and Bobbie would sabotage us...
The condiments, the bubbles,
the pet rats they planted in the vending machine.
They're so two-faced... But there's two of them, so they're four-faced!
Their whole act has been a lie... The smiles, the sparkles, the jazz hands.
I'm starting to wonder if there's any real jazz in those hands.
Well, we've got to stop them before they open up their school.
I say we expose them for the jerks they really are.
We can do it at their live taping tomorrow,
out them in front of all of their fans on live TV.
How? Their goody-goody brother and sister act is so airtight,
there's no way they'd show their true colors.
Please, no brother and sister get along that well.
Trust me, I once died my brother's hair green while he was sleeping.
Why?
I don't need a reason.
Just follow my lead. I'll get them to crack.
Wait.
When Billie and Bobbie told me that I have great fashion sense,
was that a lie too?
Eh, who am I kidding? I always look great.
Hey, um, do you think my hair is big enough?
I just sort of feel like it could be bigger right around like...
Here.
Well, look who it is.
It's bi... Bo...
You.
How is it going, ma'am?
- "Ma'am"? - Yeah.
Oh, wow, that is just so formal.
Why don't you call me by my first name?
Maybe next time.
So are you ready for the big live show?
Oh, you betcha. I always bubble with joy
whenever I get to perform for my fans.
Oh, do you have fans here too?
'Cause your brother told us that most people come to the show for him.
What?
Yeah, since he's the star of the show, he has most of the fans, right?
Oh, who told you he was the star of the show?
He did.
He said he's the real talent.
You're just kind of his backup.
(Seriously) He said what now?
(Seriously) She said what now?
Oh, yeah. She told us this whole duo act
is just a stepping stone for her to launch her solo career.
And then she went on and on about your terrible singing.
What did she compare it to again?
Oh, right. Two seals having a slap fight.
(Imitating barking seals)
And I don't even want to tell you what he said about your dancing...
- (Scoffs) - But I will tell you. He said
it's an embarrassment to your family.
(Babbles)
Why, that no-good, cherry picking, sack of marshmallows! Excuse my language.
You know what? Fine. I'm gonna go over there and give her a piece of my mind.
- (Music playing) - Oh, sounds like it might have to wait.
The show is about to start. You need to get on stage.
♪ You take a Billie ♪
♪ you add a Bobbie ♪
♪ you get a Billie ♪
♪ and a Bobbie ♪
♪ we're Billie and Bobbie ♪
- ♪ and Bobbie ♪ - ♪ And Billie ♪
- ♪ and Bobbie! ♪ - ♪ And Billie! ♪
♪ The "Billie and Bobbie show" ♪
- ♪ starring Bobbie ♪ - ♪ But mostly Billie. ♪
Whoo!
(Music playing)
Well, I guess we know who's who now.
Knock-knock.
Well, I said, "knock-knock."
Yeah, how about you get the door? I'm sick of answering it.
Fine! I will answer it!
Knock-knock. Who's there?
Canoe. Canoe who?
Canoe believe that this guy said that he's a better dancer than me?
All right, you know what?
Everybody knows that I'm the better singer.
"Happy song." Hit it!
♪ The sun is shining, the birds are chirping ♪
♪ and it's a hap-happy day ♪
♪ with my brother by my side and his sister standing by ♪
♪ we're gonna take the blues away ♪
♪ unless the sister is a snake ♪
♪ or the brother is a fake ♪
♪ he couldn't make it without me... ♪
This isn't how it goes.
You know, I like this version better.
♪ Well, mother always liked me best ♪
♪ well, you've always been a pest ♪
♪ you're a brat, and dad agrees. ♪
All right, you know what? Stop. I can't do this anymore.
You think you can do all of this without me?
Well, then good luck, because you know what?
- I quit! - Oh, you quit?
- Well, you can't quit, 'cause I quit! - Good.
Yeah.
And you can forget about our little music school
that we were gonna open up, because I never want to work with you again!
- Well, I never want to even see you again! - Good!
- Good. - Grr!
Grr!
(Music playing)
Wow, that blew up quicker than I thought.
Our plan worked.
And now we don't have to worry about them trying to take down our school.
Does anyone care that there's a live show going on and no one to perform?
I think it'll be fine.
- ♪ You take a Lily ♪ - ♪ You add a Dezy ♪
- ♪ you take a Lily ♪ - ♪ And a Dezy ♪
♪ it's Lily and Dezy ♪
- ♪ and Dezy ♪ - ♪ And Lily ♪
♪ "the Lily and Dezy show." ♪
I gotta say, this place looks great.
Oh, thank you so much, Mr. Schluxenberger.
It's Schxlumbraugh.
Why is it so hard for everyone to say?
It rhymes with Fluxumbraugh.
Anyway, you've officially passed your inspection,
and you won't be getting shut down.
Yes!
Hey, can I get a copy of that report for my parents?
I don't pass tests often.
Sure.
Well, if there's nothing else...
No. Thanks again, Mr. Schlutzen-blutzen.
Mr. Schluhsen-bluhs...
Mr. Shoshenblux...
Oh, well, if it isn't Billie and Bobbie.
And Bobbie and Billie.
Hi.
We came to say that we're sorry.
Mother said that we had to get right down here and offer you an apology pie.
Did you bring any I'm-sorry ice cream?
I like my apologies a la mode.
No?
We acted like jerks.
You know, we just saw everything y'all had going for you here,
and I guess we wanted it for ourselves.
Oh, you can have Dez.
Oh... no, thank you.
Hey, um, before we go, we have a question for you
and it's just a little bit embarrassing.
It's just it's been bugging us since, uh, we met.
Which one of you is Austin and which one of you is Ally?
Both: Seriously?