[JESSE FREDERICK'S "EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK" PLAYING]
* Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahhh *
* Ahhh *
* Whatever happened To predictability *
* The milkman The paperboy *
* Evenin' TV? *
* How did I get Delivered here? *
* Somebody tell me, please *
* This whole world's Confusin' me *
* Flowers as mean *
* As you've ever seen *
* Ain't a bird Who knows your tune *
* Then a little voice Inside you whispers: *
* "Kid, don't sell your dreams So soon" *
* Everywhere you look * * Everywhere you look *
* There's a heart * * There's a heart *
* A hand to hold on to *
* Everywhere you look * * Everywhere you look *
* There's a face *
* Of somebody who needs you *
* Everywhere you look *
* When you're lost out there And you're all alone *
* A light is waitin' To carry you home *
* Everywhere you look *
* Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahhh *
* Dooby-doo-baa-ba-daa *
[***]
Oh, Steph. You can't hang out in here.
Uncle Jesse's gonna get his first dance lesson.
I know. I got a front row seat.
[CHUCKLES] [DOORBELL RINGS]
Oh, Jess. The guys from Fat Fish Music are here.
I'll get it!
Uncle Jesse's been working on his dancing
for a couple of days.
He's come a long way.
♪ I'm dancing ♪ Gee--
Hey, you're right. He's really improved.
Jess, babe.
Dave, babe. Hit me. Come here.
I'd like you to meet one of
the hottest video directors
and choreographers in the biz,
Richard Williams.
Hey. Hi, Richard. How you doing?
Hey. Whoa.
He's good. He's very good.
Hey, listen, uh,
about this whole dance thing.
Now...guys, let's rethink this.
"Forever" is not really a dance song.
It's-- It's more of a ballad.
Not anymore.
We've rerecorded it. And now it's a rap song.
Listen, uh, David, I-- I'm not, uh...
I'm not really a rapper.
Vanilla Ice said the same thing. Ah.
Look, I've got a hot new concept for your video.
We-- It's gonna be like a whole A-- Arabian genie thing.
You're gonna love it.
It's the perfect way to get all of America
doing the Jessman.
Again with the Jessman. I-I'm not really a dancer.
Hey. Jessman...
dancing is just a matter
of putting a lot of little isolated movements together.
Simple. All right, I'll try it.
You show me what to do.
Sure. Start with your head like this:
Okay. Got that. Yeah. Good.
Now, add your shoulders, like this:
But don't stop moving your head.
All right, yeah. Just k--
Got it. Got it.
Now, add your hips like this:
Oh, but don't stop moving your head and shoulders.
Oh, yeah, the whole--
Yeah, right, see? I got--
I'm dancing, everybody.
I got it. No problem. I can dance.
Uh, yeah. Hold up, hold up, hold up.
Maybe we should start with something a little simpler.
Um, The Running Man. Something like this:
[SNAPPING] [CHUCKLES]
Open your legs from side to side, man.
I do kind of a Sammy Running Man.
♪ Chick-a-gow Chick-a-gow ♪
It's easy, Uncle Jesse.
Come on, Aunt Becky. Ready?
RICHARD: Yeah.
Well, at least someone in the family can dance.
I can sing too.
♪ I believe that children Are our future ♪
Thank you, Stephanie.
♪ Teach 'em well And let them lead the way ♪
Thank you, Stephanie. That's enough, thanks
This is not a telethon.
See, I'm not-- I-I can't dance.
I really don't know how to dance.
But you will.
Jessman, for the next 48 hours,
you are going to move your body
in ways you never thought possible.
Will this involve pain?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, good.
But check it out.
You'll end up looking like this.
Hit me!
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYS]
Ha!
[SNAPS]
Oh, I got-- I can do that. I can--
Oh.
Come on, you can do it.
All right-- Just let the music move you.
Right. Is it-- Hoo-ha. Huh.
Yeah. Come on.
Hey. Give it a little bit more.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Now, give me that kick. Give me that kick.
I got that kick. Whoa! See.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, go for that finish.
Here it goes. And I'm ready.
[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Becky. Ice.
Okay. Now, let's make a toast to your first day
in the lemonade business.
One for you. And one for me.
Cheers.
[BOTH] More sugar.
[CLEARS THROAT]
Better put another teaspoon in.
Well, that ought to wake you up and rot your teeth. Ha.
Michelle, it won't be long before you earn enough money
to buy yourself that ant farm.
I hope so.
Because my little friends can't live on this lollipop forever.
You had a great lesson, Deej.
Thanks, Kimmy.
I think my Dad was pretty impressed with my driving.
Thank God I'm alive.
You know, T-Man... for an uptight guy,
you stayed pretty cool.
Oh. Yeah, Kimmy, no sweat.
Get your lemonade!
It's a good idea. I could use a cup.
You could use some dress shields.
Kimmy...you could use some exercise.
Take a hike.
That would be 10 cents, mister.
All right. Thank you, sweetheart.
Mm.
Couple more sips of this, and I'll need dentures.
Know what, honey: I don't have any change,
all I have is a dollar.
That's no problem. Thank you.
Michelle, I just gave you a dollar.
Aren't you forgetting something?
Oh, yeah. Have a nice day.
Danny, always read the front and the back.
Joey, that's your handwriting.
You owe me 90 cents.
Come on, pay up.
Deej, bad news.
I can't study in Spain this summer
unless I pass my Spanish class.
Will you help me?
Yeah. I don't wanna spend six weeks in Spain without you.
Why do I have to learn the whole language?
All I need to know are three words:
food, boys and bathroom.
True. But you don't wanna get 'em mixed up.
Estudiamos, muchacha.
No time for dancing. We have to go study.
[SIGHS]
"Forever" video, take 27.
[SNAP]
And...action!
[***]
♪ Wassup ♪
♪ If every single word I said Is gonna make you laugh ♪
♪ If every song I sing to you Will fill your heart with joy ♪
♪ Yo, ya mo hang ♪ ♪ How long? ♪
♪ Forever ♪
♪ I asked the sky Just what we had ♪
♪ If we had, why we had ♪
♪ The love I have for you ♪
♪ Is gonna live Inside your heart ♪
♪ It's gonna hang ♪ ♪ How long? ♪
♪ Forever ♪
♪ Do the Jessman ♪
Cut! Take a break.
Well, I think it's going very well. Don't you?
We've been here for six hours,
and I don't have one frame of usable film.
Yeah, but this, uh--
This tuna? Great.
Jessman. Jessman.
Jess, man.
Do you have control of any of your body parts?
Well, I do, I do.
I just-- Uh, theoretically, it's not my fault.
See, my whole leg fell asleep
while I was crouching in that silly, uh, hamper.
Well, that's true. He has very bad circulation.
Becky, you don't need to make excuses for me.
I do have this circulation thing that happens on occasion--
Jessman--
Guys, come on, I told you, I can't dance.
I'm surprised you can walk.
This is not the "Forever" that I wanna do.
This is-- It's not my kind of music.
These are not my pants.
Jesse, trust us. We know what we're doing.
I mean, I can't believe I went with this silly thing.
Come on, we're out of here. Yeah.
I quit, pal.
Wait a minute. Here.
Whoa-ho-ho! Are you crazy?
This is your one shot at making it.
You can't just walk out. Babe.
Watch me...babe.
Oh, my God, what have I done?
And I gotta go crawling back to Fat Fish Music.
Maybe if I beg 'em, they'll give me a second chance.
Oh, I'm sorry, guys, I was so selfish.
I wasn't even thinking of you two.
I mean, I could have you totally set up.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah, with college...
trust funds...
toupees if the hair thing never happens for you.
No. I promise, guys, I won't let you down.
[COOING]
I love you so much.
Give me a chew.
Okay, Kimmy.
Conjugate the verb jugar. To play.
Please, Deej. I can't conjugate any more Spanish.
It's after midnight.
Can't we go to sleep?
En Español.
El sleep-o beg-o please-o.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
DANNY: Deej, you asleep with your light on again?
Uh, one sec, Dad. I'm just getting into bed.
You were supposed to go home two hours ago. Hide.
Kimmy, get out of there.
Deej. Is everything okay?
Sweetie, you been up studying all this time?
Sí.
Oh, Deej, you must be exhausted.
Sí.
You know what, let me give you a kiss.
No.
Whew.
So, uh...Deej,
you must be real excited
about your trip to Spain this summer.
Sí.
I hope you take my advice about ditching Kimmy.
Huh?
Oh, yeah. It's all set up.
Pepe, the piñata maker...
he's gonna wrap her in papier-mâché
and then hang her in the village square.
And all the little village children
are gonna come in with their flaming sticks.
Flaming sticks?
I got ya, Gibbler. You can come out, Deej.
[CHUCKLES]
Sorry, Dad.
I'm trying to help Kimmy with her Spanish.
Kimmy...go home.
If you wanna pass that test,
you're gonna need your sleep, okay?
Buenas noches.
Oh, nachos. Great.
I'm starving.
Maybe a couple more minutes of studying wouldn't hurt.
Okay, Michelle, $8 and 40 cents.
You sell one more cup of lemonade,
and you'll have enough money to buy yourself that ant farm.
Joey, please buy one more cup.
Michelle, I've already had 50 cups.
I'm sweating lemon juice.
You don't need to drink it, just buy it.
Why didn't I think of that 49 cups ago? Heh.
You're absolutely right.
Okay. Here you go.
Jess, come on. Are you sure
you wanna do this I Dream of Jesse video?
Uh-- No, I'd rather do the video my way.
But I've got to think of you,
and our children and our future.
It's too bad you can't just buy your own record company.
Yeah. I'm just a few bucks short, huh?
You could have my ant farm money.
Sweetheart, that's-- That's the greatest offer I ever got.
But you worked hard for that money.
And you keep that money, okay?
But I love you,
and you're more important than my ants.
Sorry, guys.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Yeah. That's Janolari.
Uh, I wish there was another way out of this.
David.
Uh, I'm sorry I blew up.
And, uh...
I'd like you to accept my apology.
Mm-hm. I knew you'd come crawling back.
Let's face it: without Fat Fish Music, you're nothing.
Who else would make you an offer like we did?
Yeah, it's funny that you mentioned that because,
you know, just before you got here,
I received a very, uh-- Very interesting new offer.
What offer? From who?
Well...
it's a 5-year-old company.
Small, but very generous.
And they really love me.
Yeah? What kind of money are they talking about?
Big money.
Enough to buy a farm.
You know, uh, Dave, you're starting to remind me of the guy
who turned down the Beatles.
What guy?
Oh, it doesn't matter.
He's the laughingstock of the music business.
Never heard from again. Yup.
He's still kicking himself about that one.
Oh, don't worry.
I'm sure you'll get another job.
Can you say,
"Would you like fries with that, sir?"
Huh.
Jess, uh... are you serious?
Yeah, I'm serious. Listen.
David, I-- I gotta go.
I gotta go with a company that believes in me. Huh.
Hey. We believe, we believe.
Hey, look, I-I know we had our creative differences,
but that's the way the biz is.
You-- You work, you fight, you do lunch...
you compromise.
We'll do the song my way, or there's no deal.
[GROANS SOFTLY]
You got it. See?
Now, we're compromising.
Jess, babe.
Dave, babe. Hit me. Come on. Go-whoa-whoa.
Okay.
Love ya.
Right back at ya.
What a goon.
[CLAPS] We did it!
JOEY: Way to go, Jess.
All right, honey.
You guys. All right.
Oh, Michelle, I couldn't have done it without you.
Thank you very much.
I don't know what I did, but I'm glad I did it.
Hundred kisses. One, two,
three, four, five...
Hola, Tanneritos.
I gotta change the locks again.
Hey, Kimmy, did you get your grades?
They just came in the mail.
I passed Spanish. Isn't that "moo-y" awesome?
Kimmy, we're going to Spain!
Let me see that, Kimmy.
Whoa. You got a D-minus.
Well, your parents must be very proud.
Yeah. My dad says with grades like this,
I'm on the fast track to air conditioning school.
Hey, everybody, come on.
I'm gonna be on MTV in a minute. G--
Joey! Girls! Come in here!
I'm gonna be on MTV!
Comet, come in here. You're gonna dig this.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYS OVER TV]
Oh. There I am. I'm on-- I'm on--
This is so exciting.
I'm Martha Quinn, and welcome to Out of the Blue,
where we feature new artists you've never heard of,
and may never hear of again.
But you might hear me again, right?
Well, you know, it's not up to me.
It's up to you out there.
And this nervous gentleman sitting next to me
is Jesse Katsopolis,
from the hot new Bay Area band, Jesse & The Rippers.
Hey, I'm Jesse. Hi.
Hi. Why don't you use that right there. That camera.
Oh, I thought you'd wanna cut to the close-up camera,
because, ooh, I'm having a good hair day and everything.
Sorry. It's your show.
I just wanna say thanks for having me on the show,
Martha-- Martha Quinn. Oh.
And, uh, you know, I just wanna say out there
that it's been a very hard struggle--
Uh, you know, a lot of-- A lot of sleepless nights,
rejection, uh, you know, actually cold sweats.
Uh, stomach cramps, gas, a bit of g--
A bit of-- A lot of gas, actually.
Okay. That's fascinating.
Why don't we get to the video.
It is called "Forever"--
Okay, I just-- I just wanted to say thanks real fast.
Thank you out there to Danny, Joey, Stephanie and D.J.--
Oh, that's very sweet. So-- I'm not done yet.
Michelle, my favorite little munchkin.
Hey, Michelle.
My wife, Rebecca. I love you very m--
My two twins, Nicky and Alex. Adorable kids, really.
Do you hear that, boys? You're famous.
This one's Nicky.
Okay. Well, we're out of time now.
I think what we'll do, we'll just bring--
Wait, wait. Are you gonna show my video though?
Okay. Just kidding.
You're not gonna have a gas attack now?
No. [LAUGHS]
Okay, we're gonna get to it.
This is Jesse & The Rippers,
and their brand new video called "Forever--"
Which is a Beach Boys song, isn't it?
It's a Beach Boys song. I know the Beach Boys.
They sang on it. Beach Boys and I are--
Great. Here we go.
Roll it. This is Jesse & The Rippers,
and it is called "Forever." "Forever."
["FOREVER" PLAYING]
♪ If every word I said Could make you laugh ♪
♪ I'd talk forever ♪
♪ Together, in love ♪
♪ I asked the sky Just what we had ♪
♪ Ooh-ooh It shone forever ♪
♪ Together, my love ♪
♪ My, my, my My, my, my ♪
♪ If the song I sing to you ♪
♪ Could fill your heart With joy ♪
♪ I'd sing forever ♪
♪ Together my love ♪ ♪ My, my, my, my, my ♪
♪ Forever ♪
♪ Ooh ♪ ♪ I've been so happy Loving you ♪
♪ Together, my love ♪
♪ Let the love I have for you Live in your heart ♪
♪ And be forever ♪
♪ Together, my love ♪
♪ Forever ♪
♪ I've been so happy Loving you ♪
♪ If every word I said Could make you laugh ♪
♪ I'd talk forever ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na Na, na, na ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na Na, na ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na Na, na, na, na ♪
♪ Yeah, na, na, na, na, Na, na, na, na, oh ♪
♪ Whoa, oh, oh Ohh, oh ♪
♪ Forever ♪
♪ I'll be so happy Loving you ♪
[APPLAUSE, CHATTER]
Yes!
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much.
That was the greatest two and a half minutes
I've ever experienced in my life.
Hm. Hey!
I mean, musically.
So, Jess, how does it feel to be a big rock star?
Oh, I'm not a big rock star. I mean, I just have one single.
I mean, who knows if people are gonna buy it or not.
Don't wanna get you excited,
but I went to the music store to buy a copy,
and they were completely sold out.
[GASPS]
STEPH: All right!
Well, I may have had, you know, just a tiny bit to do with that.
I bought every copy they had.
One for you. Thank you.
One for you.
Thank you.
Comet, my man.
Joey, my man.
Here, Steph.
* Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahhh *
[***]
* Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahhh *
* Dooby-doo-baa-ba-daa *