NARRATOR [OVER TV]: Join us next week for another intergalactic adventure on:
- Vlador's Quest. - Vlador's Quest.
[THUNDER CRASHES]
[STATIC ON TV]
Blasted storm.
[ZEKE HUMMING]
[BEEPING]
We've got a live one here.
[GRUNTING]
[CLANGS]
Huh?
[GASPS]
Log entry 31 B/12.
Uncovered alien artifact.
Similar to Thorian mind orb from episode 21 of Vlador's Quest.
Preceding back to diner... I mean, lab.
Where I will conduct in-depth analysis.
Yes!
[THUNDER CRACKS]
Contact.
[GRUNTING]
DATA LOG: Sentient data log.
[MUTTERING]
This one's gonna be close, boys.
Finally, a challenge.
Oh, sorry, were we racing?
Oh, man.
[CAR HORN HONKING]
Whoa!
[TIRES SCREECHING]
Zeke, have you lost your lug nuts? What's the deal?
I know the truth about every single one of you.
[SIGHS]
Hey, Sherm, do we need this part?
That's the break, Spinner.
Hmm.
VERT: Guys, we've got company. - Uh-oh.
- Yeah, darn right. - Zeke, no.
- Wait. AGURA: Hey.
[ZEKE CACKLES]
SHERMAN: Huh? ZEKE: Triple duranium crystal plating.
An obvious alien alloy.
[ZEKE CLEARS THROAT]
- Zeke, let... - Fancy watch from Japan, huh?
I think not.
[CHUCKLES]
And these, Sentient signs for leader, scout, hunter.
Heh, heh. What did you just say?
But if you kids are really in cahoots with the aliens...
...you'd need an underground base.
[LAUGHS]
Underground base?
No, nothing like that around here.
Yeah, I don't know what you're talking about, Zeke.
Uh, the toilet is clogged in our secret underground base.
[ALL GROAN]
Nice one, Stanford.
- This is bad. - Very bad.
ZEKE: Cover me in batter and dunk me in a deep fryer.
Crystal-based nanotech.
Greetings. I am Sage.
Oh...
[GASPS]
[ZEKE GASPS]
Hmm.
What is this thing, Sage?
A Sentient data log.
When my homeworld was overrun by the Sark and Vandals...
...the council of five protected the combined knowledge of our civilization by...
Downloading it into data logs and launching them throughout the multiverse.
The hope was survivors would collect and bring them...
...to a safe zone so we could rebuild.
The world must know of this.
No, we don't need the government meddling with our mission.
Knowing them, they'll just mess things up and let the aliens in.
Oh, you're right about that.
Hmm.
Zeke, how do you know all this stuff?
It all kind of happened after I got struck by lightning.
It must have fused the data inside this log with Zeke's mind.
Well, let's get the data out of his mind and find this safe zone.
Whoa, now, you ain't probing my mind.
You wanna get to the safe zone, I'll take you there.
You know the coordinates?
Sure do. Eh! Sure do. Sure do. Eh!
- Sure do. - This is getting weird, people.
The human brain is not equipped for the massive amount of data within these logs.
Meaning the information in Zeke's head is probably unstable.
And could be wiped out at any moment.
A sound hypothesis.
Then we'd better use Zeke's knowledge before that happens.
Sure do. Argh!
BOTH: I sense a stormshock approaching.
Who wants to hit a battlezone?
Initiating system protocol.
Constraining nulls after vectors.
Cyclotron, cycling.
Data log readings at maximum.
Let's roll, Battle Force 6.
Battle Force 6?
Actually, it's still five, I just quit.
Vert, I'm not sure taking Zeke into the zone is a good idea.
If he can lead us to more Sentient tech or even survivors...
...then it's a chance we have to take.
Okay, guys, let's burn some rubber.
What's the deal with the data log?
It syncs with a stormshock portal to take us to the right battlezone.
What about our enemies? Will they have access to the zone too?
Here's hoping.
[GASPS]
[SQUEELS]
Noob.
This is just like episodes 34, 51 and 62 of Vlador's Quest...
...all smooshed together.
You watch Vlador's Quest too?
You are aware that Vlador's Quest was based on the far superior British show...
...with the same name?
Hey, Zeke, where to now?
Yeah, we wanna get a jump-start on any enemies in this zone.
[COMPUTER BEEPING]
Too late, Sark at 12 o'clock.
Battle Force 5, you know the drill.
Zeke, we'll handle the rough stuff. You stay out...
ZEKE: Down with the Sark empire!
[GROANS]
Timber!
Everyone scatter.
[AGURA SCREAMS]
No, Agura.
[GASPS]
[GROANS]
Spinner, Sherman, get Agura out of there.
Let's roll.
Stanford, Zoom, time to wreck some Sark.
Wrecking Sark is how I relax.
[TIRES SCREECHING]
I can help.
No, thanks, you've done enough.
Yeah, we got them.
Mine.
ZOOM: Whoo-hoo!
[SPINNER GRUNTING]
Yee-haw!
A Sentient data pod. Zurk, retrieve it.
They're going for the data log. Zeke, hang tight, we'll save you.
[AGURA GRUNTS]
Vlador faced just such a predicament in episode 42 of...
Vlador's Quest, yeah, yeah.
He was able to divert the energy from his ship.
And short-circuit the attacking robots.
With an EMP blast.
[SCREAMS]
ZEMERIK: Zug, system damaged.
Must retreat and repair.
Electromagnetic pulse.
Whoo! Keep hitting them with that and we're golden.
It can do it once every four hours.
And only if you reroute the power through the mini hadron colliders.
That EMP blast was pretty impressive.
I think I'm getting a hang of this hero stuff.
AGURA: Uh, Vert, go to channel four.
We need to send him back now.
Before he drops an obelisk on someone else.
He didn't mean it, Agura.
Is this the Sentient safe zone?
Scanning memory bank.
Scanning, scanning.
Scan coming, unload data.
[GASPS]
[CAR HORN HONKS]
Hey, buddy, are you all right?
I'm not sure I'm interpreting the data correctly...
...but we need to head into an interzone.
A zone within a zone?
- Like in episode 33 of Vlador's Quest. SHERMAN: Episode 33 of Vlador's Quest.
One more mention of Vlador's Quest and I'm gonna lose it.
- How do we get into a zone within a zone? SHERMAN: Um...
[ZEKE BLOWING NOSE]
Well, the instructions don't say.
Well, if we need to get into another zone...
...we're probably looking for a portal of some type and a key.
Huh? And if we assume this is the key...
...then all we're looking for... - Is a key hole.
Everyone spread out and search.
Looks like they're cowering before some sort of guardian.
VERT: A phoenix.
[RUMBLING]
Hmm?
Huh?
SHERMAN: Guys, I think I've got something.
There's faint energy readings from the top of that obelisk.
Of course, the data log.
VERT: Agura, climb up and insert the data log.
No prob, but make sure Zeke doesn't knock it down while I'm up there.
STANFORD: Hmm? - Ah...
VERT: Hmm.
- Huh? - Ah!
Everyone stay back from the vortex.
Or we'll disintegrate, we get it.
VERT: Sark closing fast.
ZEMERIK: Destroy organics and retrieve Sentient artifact.
It is leading them to something.
The only question now is...
- "Why?" - No.
- "When?" - No.
- "How?" - "What?"
The only question is, "What?"
Zeke, the data log.
This is just like episode 26, "Vlador's Last Stand."
SHERMAN: Where he was trapped with no escape.
- And had to make a leap of faith into... - A swirling neutrino galaxy.
Awesome.
VERT: The phoenix.
Everyone into the vortex.
Excuse me?
Vert.
ZOOM: Where Vert goes, I go.
Yes.
I can't believe I'm doing this.
Out of the frying pan and into the vortex.
Huh?
[TIRES SCREECHING]
Whoa. That was intense.
ZOOM: Whoa!
The interzone.
ALL: Whoa!
SPINNER: Cool. - How'd you know we would rematerialize?
The phoenix represents rebirth.
Something that's destroyed, but then reformed.
You risked our lives based on artwork made of stick figures?
No risk, no reward. Okay, everyone, let's move.
It won't take Zemerik long to figure it out too.
ZUG: The organics self-terminated.
The Earth is defenseless.
Jumping into a vortex of anti-matter is completely illogical.
The organics are illogical.
That is what makes them weak.
Or perhaps that is what makes them strong.
Zurk, advance.
[GASPS]
ZEKE: This must be it.
Sentient survivors could be behind that door.
With the answers to everything I've always wanted to know about the universe.
Then let's crack it open.
AGURA: Could the data log be the key? ZEKE: No.
According to the Sentient hieroglyphics...
...I think you're supposed to press this.
ALL: Oh!
[WHIRRING NOISE]
That sounds like someone just turned on the world's scariest air-conditioning unit.
SHERMAN: Look, energy.
Huh?
SHERMAN: I think we have to connect these pipes.
So it flows from there to there before the energy leaks.
A puzzle? Puzzles hurt my brain.
A positron flow lock to be precise.
[GRUNTS]
ZOOM: Huh?
Guys, we got company.
Zeke, keep on trucking.
Everyone else, it's slice-and-dice time.
[GRUNTS]
A few more pieces and I'll know everything.
The secrets of the multiverse decoded at last.
ZOOM: Whoo-hoo!
Shred it. Ah!
Oh, no, you don't.
[GROANS]
Okay, easy.
Easy, that's gonna...
Consarnit.
Guys, a little help here.
- We're all tied up. - Well, in one sec I'm gonna be all drilled up.
Easy. Yes, oh, baby.
There we go. So close.
AGURA: Someone help me.
Uh...
[SIGHS]
I can't believe I'm doing this.
SENTIENT COMPUTER: Access to vault, denied.
Ahh!
[CAR HORN HONKING]
Agura, you okay?
- Perfect. - You pathetic post-protozoan organisms.
- May you rot in this zone forever. VERT: Hey.
- What? - What, what?
What?
Recalculating.
SENTIENT COMPUTER: Sark intruders.
Zone compromised.
What?
SENTIENT COMPUTER: Initiating self-destruct.
[RUMBLING]
Time to get out of here. Let's get to that portal.
SENTIENT COMPUTER: Self-destruct in five. VERT: Move, move, move.
SENTIENT COMPUTER: Four.
Three.
Two.
One.
[SCREAMING]
[ZEKE GROANING]
Zero, zero, one, E=mc2, a double cheeseburger.
His brain is finally overloaded.
It's deleting all the Sentient data.
Is the old chap gonna be okay?
AGURA: I hope so. - I like turtles.
- He saved my life. - He will be fine.
But he will not remember anything from the time of the lightning strike.
All right, guys, let's get him back to the desert.
[GASPS]
They are coming.
- Hmm? - Huh?
[SHERMAN GROANS]
ZEKE: Well, I'll tell you what, I conked out in my truck.
And I had the wildest dream.
Dream?
Yeah, about inter-dimensional battlezones.
And killer robots and aliens. Ha, ha.
And the best part, you were all there.
Really? Sounds, uh, pretty far-fetched.
Yeah, I know. Ha, ha.
Hey, my recorder.
I'm sure I documented my discovery of the alien artifact.
Log entry 31 B/12.
What in blazes?
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ON RECORDER]
I didn't know you were a fan of the Battle Force 5.
Great punk band.
Oh!
[WHISPERING] Nicely done, Stanford. Ha, ha. Nicely done.
[ENGLISH SDH]