(GROOVY MUSIC)
Thank you for coming tonight.
It's my pleasure to introduce to you Mr Larles Chander.
- (LAUGHS) - I mean Charles Lander. Ah!
The lifts never work, there are cracks in the walkway.
Mm-hm.
And there is more moss in the buildings than the forest.
So, I hope you're all as excited as I am
to hear what Mr Lander has to slay.
I mean say. Ah!
Oh, don't worry, huh. It will be perfect.
You know I would feel more confident if you were there.
Why do you have to work today?
You don't need me there,
but, uh... you might want to remove them things.
- Is it a new hairstyle? - Oh, my goodness.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
- You got one more. - Help me. Have I got any more?
- No, you got two more there. - OK. One.
- And, mm-hm. - Where's the other one?
- It's there. - What?
Why are you like this?
- Why are you like that? - Why am I like that?
- Because you are like this. - Aggie, Aggie.
Sync & corrections by emeline-whovian www.addic7ed.com
Look, you'll be back in time for the second half.
It's alright, I'll just stay here.
I'll sit quietly.
Don't really like crowds, anyway. There's too many Germans around.
Ooh, one sec.
Bagpipes, I've got us seats at the front.
- Oh. - Come on.
- Great. - You just go there.
- Nervous? - Yes.
You'll be great.
Just cover the issues on the estate and I'll present the solutions.
- OK. - Easy, just like we discussed.
And be yourself.
These people don't know me from Larry Grayson, but they trust you.
- OK. - That's why I chose you to help me.
(CLEARS THROAT)
Thank you all for coming tonight to our special meeting.
Um, I asked Mr Padgett how long I should speak for
and he said, "Speak for as long as you like, but I'm leaving at 9:00."
(ALL LAUGH)
♪ Get down on it ♪
- ♪ Get down on it ♪ - ♪ Come on and... ♪
- Valy! - Oh, oh, sorry, sorry.
OK. Can't go any faster?
No. Do you want me to look this good?
Good point. Hey, Andy.
I'm so sorry we got delayed.
(CHUCKLES)
Sounds like dinner went well.
If you can call two packets of Hefty nuts
and a coke at the Milton dinner.
Hey, I had to prioritise making my playlist over cooking, huh?
There wasn't enough time to do both, eh?
Yeah, well, you'd better put on a good show tonight.
I need some of your finest Afrobeats to help me unwind.
Mm, your wish is my command. Huh?
Oh, how about some Kiki Gyan to get me going?
Schweh!
I am dating a mind-reader.
So, who's getting the first round?
Do they serve Naughty Bastards?
Oh, those are the only people they serve in here.
Hey!
Let me get them. Let's try my cocktail; Jamaican Me Hot.
White rum, coconut, spices, and Dawn's special ingredient,
passionfruit gin.
Sheesh!
Valy, you are in big trouble.
Ah, show me to my bedroom.
- ♪ Get your back up off the wall - ♪ Tell me... ♪
So, this is the car Don's got you moving?
Nah, it's mine. Don gave me a great deal.
(LAUGHS) Wait, serious?
- You bought these wheels? - Mm-hm.
Whoo, what?!
No, I'm impressed, man! Seriously, I'm impressed!
This is a powerful motor!
And a nice back seat for the lady.
I'm not a lady.
- It's a beauty, right? - Does this actually go anywhere?
Let's take her for a spin.
OK.
(ENGINE STARTS)
(ENGINE STOPS)
- I thought you could drive? - I can.
(ENGINE STARTS)
(ENGINE STOPS)
Where the headlights?
ON RADIO: ♪ You gotta fight for your right... ♪
OK, that's it. Let me out.
Where are the doors?
Why aren't there doors?
Um, maybe we should take her out tomorrow.
So, having run over all of our issues,
I am certain that our special guest will be able to solve our problems
here on the Eastbridge.
So, without further ado, I present to you Mr Charles Lander.
Thank you, Agnes.
Ladies and gentlemen.
I don't like him. Don't like him at all.
What does improving the estate mean?
It means giving you the life and environment that you deserve.
Things like gardens, playgrounds.
And this is what it could look like.
- BAGPIPES: That's it. - (AUDIENCE RESPONDS POSITIVELY)
Go on, son.
Go on, go on! Go on, son!
Uh, lovely drawing.
Go on, son.
And the smaller houses start from as little as £60,000.
- Hey! - What?!
- 60? - Wait, we have to buy our own homes?
(CHUCKLES) If you want to live here, yes.
- What does he mean? - I... I... I...
Well, I mean, they're gonna knock down the flats.
But I live here. Well, I wouldn't take it personally.
What if we can't afford to buy one?
We are looking to rehouse those residents
in new rental accommodation on the estate.
You see?
- Or elsewhere. - Hey!
Mr Charles, so, if people can't afford to buy,
you can't guarantee they will be rehoused here?
We are working on a solution with the council.
Thank you. Thank you, everybody. Thank you for your time.
Mr Charles! This is not what you talked about!
- (ALL MUTTER ANGRILY) - Charles! Charles!
- (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS) - (ALL CHEER)
Alright, cheers.
♪ Monday through to Friday ♪
♪ Sexy dance ♪
♪ Sunday ♪
♪ And on Sunday ♪
♪ Sexy dance ♪
♪ All week long ♪
♪ All night long ♪
♪ Sexy dance ♪
♪ People groovin' ♪
♪ All the week through ♪
- ♪ Doo, doo ♪ - ♪ Sexy dance... ♪
(ALL CHEER)
Yeah, I'm so sorry.
We discussed everything,
but he never mentioned anything about demolition and rehousing.
Some of the houses in here look alright.
I can't afford one, and it doesn't sound to me as though
Mr Lander has given much thought to where I'll be rehoused.
Well, maybe there's a way we can do the improvements
without flattening the whole place.
Like what?
You tried campaigning for that garden space
and no-one was interested.
But with this plan, I get my own garden, and so could you, Ag.
Is that what you wanted?
Oh, well said, love.
I don't want to move. And what about poor old Vic?
This wasn't the plan, I promise.
Why did you bring that man around here, then?
You know, I wish I never did.
I'm so sorry.
You will be when this community is torn apart.
Maureen. Maureen, please. Ahh!
(CROCKERY BREAKS)
Yes! Get in!
♪ Hit that perfect beat, boy... ♪
This place is amazing!
From now on, I only want to play at clubs like this.
The crowd in here loves me!
So, you'll be back, yeah?
As soon as Andy invites me to DJ again, mark it.
I will be back in that booth. Hey!
- I've pulled. - Ooh, which one?
- The one you were dancing with? - Nope.
The hot one you were dancing with.
- Ooh. - Hey, don't mix me there!
I was not dancing with any hot woman. Why are you saying that?
No, he means the guy from before.
Hey, hey, you joker.
(CHUCKLES)
You do know this is a gay club, Valy?
(COUGHS)
Eish, you see that?
Eish.
♪ I've got that feeling, that beat boy feeling ♪
♪ I've got that feeling, that beat boy feeling... ♪
You do know I'm gay, yeah?
Uh, you? No.
I thought you were just blocking me because you're in love with Dawn.
(LAUGHS) No fucking way!
- Alright. - No offence.
It's just, uh... I'm not familiar with these, uh, gay people.
- We don't have any in Sierra Leone. - Oh, really?
Like in Nigeria or Ghana?
Hey, you heard that, too, hey?
I'd hoped you'd have less-traditional views,
dating Dawn and being a DJ.
Back home, this, uh... kind of behaviour, it is not legal.
Well, it is legal here.
I don't know what else to say, eh?
I mean, is it even natural for a man to love another man?
- Is it...? - Yes!
- Is it natural? - Eh!
In the Bible, it says Adam and Eve, not Adam and Ade, not Adam and Kwame.
Ugh! You didn't tell me he was one of those.
- Come on, let's go. - No, wait.
Seriously?
This is all making you feel uncomfortable?
You know, in our line of work, we hear some difficult stuff,
but nothing as disappointing as that!
- Now can we go? - Yes!
♪ Beat, boy, Beat, boy ♪
♪ Hit that perfect beat, boy ♪
♪ Beat, boy, Beat, boy ♪
♪ Beat, beat, beat, beat ♪
♪ Beat, boy, Beat, boy ♪
♪ Hit that perfect beat, boy ♪
♪ Hit that perfect, hit that perfect... ♪
Ah, are you Batman?
Huh? Have you got a milk round?
Me ti asi, huh?
I can't believe I fell for this man's flattery and small talk.
Well, he's not the first man you met with a smooth tongue.
(CLICKS TONGUE)
I thought he was going to do good for our community, not destroy it.
How many times have I told you never trust a Nigerian businessman?
They are snaky.
He has turned everyone against me.
(SPEAKS NATIVE LANGUAGE)
Well, we can fix it.
But not tonight, tomorrow.
Aggie?
You're right, Walter.
Walter...
What now?
Eh, Aggie, I've dreamt of you coming to bed wearing many things,
but not this thing.
- Hm. - What you doing?
I am fixing it.
OK, Batman, Robin is going to bed.
Goodnight.
Yes, Kobna, let's get these fly wheels rolling, man!
- Hey, ho! - GIRL: Watch out.
(MUSIC PLAYS ON RADIO)
Let's keep a low profile.
Shades on, my friends.
Yeah.
What the fuck are those?
They're my mum's. I couldn't find any others.
Alright, look, it's cool, forget it.
Look, come on, let's just bounce.
(ENGINE STARTS)
(ENGINE STOPS)
(ENGINE STARTS)
(ENGINE STOPS)
It just needs to warm up.
Think you need to warm up.
♪ Now I'm just standin' here shootin' the gip
♪ Me and D and my Adidas standing on 2 Fifth... ♪
Vic?
Vic, wait there.
♪ My Adidas. ♪
Oh, Vic, good afternoon.
I wondered, can I help you with anything?
No.
- I have some cake. - No!
All you wanna do is get my house knocked down.
Now, hop it. Go on, on your bike.
Hang on. These don't look half bad.
- In fact, that looks very nice. - My own recipe.
- Is it? - Yes.
Alright, thank you very much.
Now you can hop it. Go on.
BAGPIPES: Oh, oh! Goal!
Hey, Bagpipes.
I need some advice.
Oh, well, if it's, uh... practical advice you want...
...I'm your man.
Thank you.
Last night, I took Dawn out,
a woman I really, really, really like.
And I, uh, said some things that may have upset her and her friend Andy,
and now she won't speak to me.
Oh, well, see, romance is not my forte.
You know, extractor fans, yeah, but romance, nah.
Hey, Bagsy, please.
I'm desperate.
Look, if she won't answer you,
you've gotta do what Richard Gere did
in 'An Officer and A Gentleman'.
Go to where she works, apologise,
sweep her off her feet,
everyone applauds, the end.
- Where does she work? - She's a nurse at a clinic in town.
- Hey, hey. - Ah.
Well, perfect, I could do with a check-up.
- I've got this nasty rash, uh... - Ah!
Bagpipes, why are you telling me this?
Ho-ho, it's quite something. I mean, it's all up my leg.
Bagpipes, please.
I don't want to know about your nasty rash.
I tell you, it's like a map of the Bahamas.
The Bahamas?
♪ When I look back ♪
♪ Boy, I must have been green... ♪
Easy to get an appointment here, isn't it?
This is much nicer and quieter than the surgery I normally go to.
Oh, I see.
I'll have to start coming here more often.
(CLEARS THROAT)
Uh, Bagpipes?
Why don't we sit in the VIP seats, hey?
Alright.
♪ To your soul ♪
♪ To your soul... ♪
Mr Momodu Tamba?
♪ Ahh-ahh-ahh ♪
♪ Ahh-ahh... ♪
Hey.
Mr Momodu Tamba?
Dawn, I am very sorry.
Yeah, save it, I've got real work to do.
Please, let me explain.
- That sort of club is new to me... - Yeah, you said.
And there are no gays anywhere in Africa. Anything else?
And while it makes me uncomfortable to think of a man with another man...
Or a woman with another woman.
Well, that makes me less uncomfortable.
- Valentine. - I'm trying to be honest with you.
Listen, love is love, yeah?
No matter who is doing the loving.
Imagine what it's like for Andy.
He's gay and he's black.
He can't tell his parents, he can't even go home.
Where he's from, he will be stoned just for being gay.
He doesn't need your narrow judgements on top of it all, Valy.
If this thing between us is ever gonna work,
you're gonna have to be a bit more understanding.
So...
...there's still a thing between us?
You're very hard to shake off.
(HALF-LAUGHS)
(BARKS)
Like a sweet puppy?
(LAUGHS) No! No!
More like an annoying, yappy, little terrier,
just keeps humping my leg.
Oh.
It's going to take a while for me to get used to
the way things work in Britain.
But I really want to try to be open to the differences.
Shall we start again?
Yeah.
And I know just the thing to help.
Oh.
Hey.
(ENGINE STARTS)
- Yes! - Big man, you've done it!
Oh, shit!
Shades on. Let's wreck this bad shit up!
♪ This speech is my recital ♪
♪ I think it's very vital ♪
- ♪ To rock ♪ - ♪ A rhyme ♪
- ♪ That's right ♪ - ♪ On time ♪
- ♪ It's Tricky is the title ♪ - Here we go!
♪ It's Tricky to rock a rhyme To rock a rhyme... ♪
Ooh, shit!
- Bruv, ain't that your uncle? - I'm dead.
(MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY)
Ah, Kobna, you were driving?
Uncle, please, I'm sorry.
Sorry? Sorry is not good enough!
Eh! You think it's funny?
Eh? Eh? You want a beating, too?
Don't let me see you here again.
Useless boys.
Whose is the car?
Answer me.
Uncle, it's mine.
Small boy like you own a car?
Eh?
Do your parents know?
No. Please don't tell them. I'll pay for the damage.
And who will pay for my whiplash?
Uncle, I swear, I wasn't going that fast.
- You can't be injured. - Ai!
I am in severe pain!
Please, I'll do anything.
Oi.
What am I to do, Lord?
Eh? Eh?
A good disciple does not bear false witness.
So, perhaps it is better I forgive this sinner
and help him to repent!
Yes, please, uncle.
- Forgive me, I'll repent. - Mm, OK.
I have a few odd jobs for you to do to walk off the damage, eh?
And then I will decide whether I tell your parents.
You're still here, eh?!
Jeez!
Ai!
Come out the car.
Trixie loves a walk.
- If you could pick her up at 8:30... - Excuse me. Sorry.
- LANDER: Alright, gentlemen. - Thank you.
Mr Lander.
So, you used me to gain a better understanding of this community
to destroy it for your gain.
- For everyone's gain. - Mm.
Look at this place.
You can't seriously think it's better left like this.
People like you need people like me to help you live a better life.
Do you really think people won't vote for all the improvements?
You can't stand in the way of progress, Agnes.
W'agyime paa!
Just a little bit four times a day.
That didn't take long.
Valy is taking us out.
As an apology, so we can get to know each other better.
- Eh? - Mm.
I shall be the judge of that.
Did you see the way he looked at me?
You never told me this was a clap clinic.
But you said you had that rash.
Not like that.
Anyway, Andy said it's just a patch of eczema,
which is, uh, quite common, especially around the, uh...
Whoa, we are not having that conversation.
Naughty Bastard?
No, I just told you, it's eczema.
- No, I meant... - Oh, drink?
Shit, yeah.
♪ Jitterbug ♪
♪ Jitterbug... ♪
- Hey. - Do you wanna...?
Half the estate hates me.
But on the bright side, the other half
who want the estate knocked down, they love ya.
Huh, even Frank has barred me from the pub.
Hoo!
- No-one gets barred from that place. - Exactly!
All that is left is for us to fight
to save the Eastbridge and every home.
It's a lot of people to convince, love.
Well, me and you, that's a start.
(SIGHS)
I can count on your vote, can't I?
You can't look after everyone, Ag.
You need to put your family first, and that's what I'm gonna do.
But the Eastbridge community is family.
(HALF-LAUGHS)
It's the first place since I arrived in this country that felt like home.
Home? You've just got yourself barred.
(LAUGHS SOFTLY)
Sorry.
I dunno what to say.
WALTER: Dear Mama, we all miss you.
Kobna is growing up so fast, and since your last visit,
he has really been behaving himself.
Agnes is well and has recently taken up painting.
And Valy, he continues making friends wherever he goes.
Oh, he takes after his mama.
♪ Shablamida Shablamidi, shablamida ♪
♪ Time ♪
♪ See it all in his wisdom hear ♪
♪ His truth will abound... ♪
Sync & corrections by emeline-whovian www.addic7ed.com