♪ Into the Dark 2x05 ♪ My Valentine
- Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com -
Welcome back to Coda-cast,
the weekly podcast for the recovering co-dependent.
Let's dive right back in.
We all know that boundaries are crucial
to successful romantic relationships,
but if you've been living in a state
where boundaries and healthy personal limits
simply do not exist,
you could be experiencing what's called enmeshment.
Where you're defined more by the feelings
of your partner than your own.
The emotional needs of the other person dwarf yours,
you feel their feelings,
your true identity is lost or blended into theirs.
You feel responsible for the emotional state of your partner
often desiring to fix or to save them.
And the bad news, unfortunately,
doesn't stop there.
Those that successfully break free
of the prison of enmeshment
could find that this throws their entire being into crisis.
A lack of authentic self-development
makes this freedom feel like annihilation,
and with any immense relational change
even a necessary one, comes chaos.
- The attached... - God!
... system in distress cries out wondering,
who am I without my partner?
This person who was my world.
What are my own feelings untethered from this person?
How will I survive?
How can I ever feel safe again?
If this is you...
If this is you, take comfort;
know that you have the right to love yourself first.
You should be your own first priority.
You are worthy of your own love.
♪ Sirens call ♪
♪ I saw the match in your hand ♪
♪ Poison swallow ♪
♪ They don't want me to mend ♪
♪ I fall ♪
♪ Every time ♪
♪ Storm is coming ♪
♪ Take back a life from their hand ♪
♪ Callin' my bluff, ♪
♪ I never needed no one ♪
♪ Turn these scars back to heart ♪
♪ I never needed no one ♪
♪ I fell through ♪
♪ All of the lies you tried to hide in my mind ♪
♪ Now I love the parts of me that aren't you ♪
♪ I'm not who I was before ♪
♪ Anymore ♪
♪ In my head ♪
♪ We play the sound of regret ♪
♪ Wider fall ♪
♪ Thought I would drown in your bed ♪
♪ Do I know ♪
♪ You're gonna crack from inside ♪
♪ It's just that I ♪
♪ Won't be the girl terrified ♪
♪ Callin' my bluff, ♪
♪ I never needed no one ♪
♪ Turn these scars back to heart ♪
♪ I never needed no one ♪
♪ I fell through ♪
♪ All of the lies you tried to hide in my mind ♪
♪ Now I love the parts of me that aren't you ♪
♪ I'm not who I was before ♪
♪ Anymore ♪
Thank you.
Dude, straight slayin'.
If you told me six months ago...
Hey, teamwork, dreamwork, motherfucker.
- It's all you, dude. - Hey.
Once again, I am Valentine Fawkes.
My best friend, the unstoppable Julie Voccola on guitar.
- Fuck you, too, Julie. - Hey, fuck you back, bud.
- It's not worth it. - I'm not gonna let 'em harass you.
I want to thank you all for coming out here tonight.
As some of you may know,
this is my first show in a few years,
and I am just blown away that you're all here.
Uh, okay, we've got one more for ya.
I wrote it almost five years ago.
And for the record, yes, this song is mine.
It's called The Knife.
- You suck! - Get off the stage!
♪ In the dark I feel you ♪
♪ One more breath, everything could change ♪
Get off the stage!
Hey, this isn't a comedy show, dude.
- Could have fooled me. - All things being equal,
you didn't heckle during our set,
so we can't let you heckle during hers.
Are you feeling left out?
I liked your set, at least I thought I did.
- Do you know her? - Not personally.
I try not to befriend psycho bitches.
So you guys are just creepy misogynist types, is that it?
Do I look like a misogynist?
Shit is societal.
Women can be just as sexist...
- Okay, lady. - The name is Rosa.
- And this is Nick. - They know that,
they watched our set. Can we please go now?
Rosa, take a gander at the girl on stage.
Does she look like someone you might have seen someplace?
♪ Edge of the knife ♪
♪ We're dancing with danger ♪
♪ I feel our blood collide ♪
♪ Electrified ♪
♪ My soul is rearranging ♪
♪ Cross my heart, hope to die ♪
♪ Dance with you on the knife ♪
- Trezzure. - The Trezzure?
- No, that girl... - Is not her.
- She is the spitting image. - Yep.
Same hair, same voice.
- Same songs. - ♪ Lookin' messy ♪
♪ You feel the earth shaking me ♪
♪ And now we're running full speed ♪
♪ Full speed ♪
This bargain bin Betty bites an artist's look,
bites an artist's style, and just fuckin' bites.
It's sick, it makes me sick, you make me sick!
♪ Edge of the knife ♪
Some people are deranged.
And you guys are here because?
We're Trezzure's representatives.
Oh, sick.
I mean, me and Nick are looking for new management.
We moderate The Trezzury.
The Trezzury,
the biggest Trezzure fan board in the entire world.
Original superfans only.
Look, can we go now?
Stuff's just sittin' out back.
We're basically begging to get robbed.
Are you gonna talk during her entire set too?
I mean, you are just as bad as these guys.
You were talking.
I'm being as bad as precisely you.
Well, not precisely precisely,
because you were gonna drop to your knees
if they were industry.
Industry doesn't heckle, so that was a clue.
Okay, I cannot believe the way
that you speak to me, Nick.
On Valentine's Day?
Since when do we believe in greeting card holidays?
Since always.
Or did you think I was being ironic
when I got you a card and chocolate and flowers?
You know what? Forget about it.
I'll go load up so we don't get robbed.
Drama.
I seriously thought she was being ironic.
♪ Electrified ♪
♪ My soul is rearranging ♪
♪ Cross my heart, hope to die ♪
♪ I'll dance with you on the knife ♪
What'll it be?
Vodka rocks, please and thank you.
Oh, it's $10, even.
Where did you get that done?
Um, Body Electric on Melrose.
- Oh. - My guy's name is Samir.
He does good work.
Looks amazing.
Thanks.
I'm Royal, by the way.
- Eddie. - Great name.
Classic.
She almost done?
Set's over in five.
Well, then this is for you.
As soon as the crowd clears,
I would really love it if you and the other staff
could take the rest of the night off.
- What? - You heard me.
Yeah, that's not gonna happen.
Look, I just need a little privacy
with my old friend up there.
See, I'm here to surprise her,
I'd kind of like to keep that surprise discreet.
Discreet.
Not to be that guy, but...
I'm kind of a public figure.
Here, you can look me up.
Damn, really.
I'm gonna go powder my nose
and let you think about that.
♪ Edge of the knife ♪
♪ We're dancing with danger ♪
♪ I feel our love collide ♪
♪ Cross my heart, hope to die ♪
♪ I'll dance with you on the knife ♪
Thank you!
Uh, thank you to the 3 of Hearts Club
for having us and for all of you guys
for coming out tonight.
Seriously, thank you.
Carrying all of that gear would have taken
another 20 minutes if you hadn't come through.
Always happy to help.
I think your lady might need you.
Yeah.
All you had to do was say, "Hey, Nick, need a hand".
Or you could see that I need a hand
with your eyes.
We could actually be in sync for once.
Oh, you want a psychic.
I see, what is that, your love language?
I got you that book to help you out,
hoping you might catch half a clue
on how to more effectively communicate with me.
Well, I'm sorry my love language is English.
It's also your being-a-dick language.
What the fuck though?
How many people have his exact hair?
Are we talking in Silverlake
or the greater Los Angeles area?
I swear it was him.
He's here... somewhere.
Have you seen my phone?
I saw it on the couch before.
Yeah.
You want me to call it?
Welcome back.
I really can't take that.
Think about how hard you work all the time.
You deserve it.
And you can get it just for relaxing.
Relax, on me.
I'm sorry, but I can't take it.
Oh, come on, Eddie.
Easiest thousand bucks you'll make ever.
Thank you, thank you very much.
45 minutes, okay?
Nope.
An hour.
Fine.
All right, I need everyone to clear out.
We're closing early for a private event.
You are an angel.
Did we leave 'em on stage?
Dude, I told you.
Okay, just wait here, I'll go check it out.
Jules, that was him.
It's him.
Oh, there she is.
Valentine Fawkes, the myth, the legend.
God, you look...
You look great, Val, really great.
Good to see you.
It's been way too long.
What are you doing here, Royal?
I'm here to congratulate you.
I see Julie's still hanging out.
- Hi, Julie. - Hi fuckwad.
Hey, I really liked you playing that axe up there.
It was nice.
The sound was tasty too.
You know, you're actually getting a lot better.
Oh, cool, get fucked, dude.
Please give me back my phone.
- Wow. - Julie's too.
She thinks I...
She thinks I took her phone.
Wow, just wow.
You're delusional, chica.
Yeah, I read on the forum
that she tried to break into your house.
Val's an emotional woman.
I don't want to be too clinical
and say she had a mental break.
No, that's... that's not what happened.
Then what did happen?
We should get out of here now.
I could tell the whole story if you wanted.
Maybe that'd clear things up.
I hear the chat on the forums.
Maybe this is a good time to set the record straight.
What do you say, Val?
- Fucking absolutely. - Hell yeah.
Hey? We could do it together.
Hard pass.
I was speaking to Val.
Val?
Val...
Well, I guess this one's on me then.
Oh, come on.
Are you scared of me?
Where is my god damn phone, Royal?
How 'bout this?
I just want to share with my friends
a little story time.
We'll all help you find your phone afterwards.
He's a windbag, always has been.
Just let him wear himself out.
So, um, five years back,
Val and I meet at this crazy party,
and the attraction is there from the get-go.
The sexual chemistry is there from the jump.
It's dominant.
Sorry, I'm just speaking my truth.
Speak it, Daddy Royal.
So, uh, things get physical,
and if I'm speaking plainly,
the sex is unfuckingbelievable.
But around this time, I'm looking for a female voice,
you know, to work on some demos
that I'm pitching to name type artists.
And so I invite her over to my brand new studio.
She tells me from the get-go
that she has performance ambitions.
I'm getting into artist development, you know,
I'll indulge her, I'll see where it goes.
I help her figure out how to dress,
how to present herself like a star instead of a slob.
But, ultimately, things didn't work out between us.
Once the choice was made, we moved on.
- It's over. - No, it's not!
It's not over until I say it's over!
It's not over!
That's... not what happened.
- We were a team. - I thought I was telling a story.
Anyway, years passed, we lose touch like you do.
- Ha. - By this time,
Trezzure and I are on the come-up.
Val sees the success I built,
and the deep, perfect love that Trezzure and I share.
She has this snap in her brain
where she jumps online,
starts screaming about our history,
claiming that Trezzure and I jacked her songs,
jacked her look, slandering us like it's her job.
That is not your job.
Which brings us to tonight.
Val booked this gig to play songs
that belong to me and to Trezzure,
because Valentine Fawkes is a god damn thief.
You skipped the part about how
you're currently violating a restraining order.
That's BS, Julie, damn BS.
Whatever, dude, bye.
Holy shit.
Is there a handsome, shaggy-haired man in here?
♪ That you do ♪
Oh my God!
♪ Baby ♪
♪ If you treasure me, I'll treasure you ♪
♪ I'll be the centerpiece inside your room ♪
♪ We'll decorate the world in baby blue ♪
♪ Blue, blue ♪
♪ Baby ♪
♪ If you treasure me, I'll treasure you ♪
♪ We'll sail the seven seas and trenches too ♪
♪ You know my body's calling out for you ♪
♪ You, you ♪
Let's go, let's leave.
I love you so much, Trezzure.
We love you so, so much.
Aww, I love you too, friends.
- What's your name? - Allison!
Allison, yay!
Thanks so much for being a fan.
I told her to wait in the car.
I didn't want this to become a big thing.
- I don't wanna... - Just give me 30 seconds.
Hear me out.
Come on, Val.
You disappeared from my life overnight.
Give me 30 seconds.
Hello?
Is anybody there?
Hello?
Don't you feel, I don't know,
a little bit trapped?
No, do you?
No.
You wanna break up?
Fine.
- Let's break up. - Look, I don't wanna...
Wait, as a band or as a couple?
As a couple.
We're always gonna be a band.
Good.
Great, good, perfect.
You made your little comeback or whatever,
you made your point.
My point?
The fact is, you're right.
I need you, Val.
For the second album.
- Her second album? - Yeah.
You want me to work on her second album?
Don't be mean, I just think we could help each other here.
Oh, it feels easier to breathe.
Do you feel that?
Sure.
So, is that it then?
I can just go to the food truck
and get a grilled cheese instead of a post-show bang?
Or... do you still want a post-show bang?
Can we still post-show bang if we're not a couple?
It's our band.
We can make whatever band rules we want.
Back door's a no-go.
What did he say to you?
Thanks to friends like you...
... and the love of my life right here,
I feel very safe and protected.
Hello, sweetness.
I thought we said we were gonna wait in the car.
- I got bored. - Did you now?
So, uh, what are you guys gonna do about her?
He's just here to have a compassionate conversation with her.
Aren't you, babe?
Trezzure, we all love your message so, so hard,
but, like, we also can't negotiate with terrorists,
- right? - Oh.
I believe that every problem can be solved
with kindness and understanding.
- Sweetness. - Hm?
There's water behind that bar.
If you're not resting, you should at least be hydrating.
- But I, um, had some... - Glastonbury, sweetness.
Glastonbury.
Excuse me, friends.
Hey, hey.
I really, really appreciate you guys coming here tonight.
Oh my God, it's our pleasure.
We're so honored you reached out to the board.
Do you mind guarding the door from the outside,
making sure there's no ins and outs?
I don't want any crazy fan interactions.
We'll find a way out of here.
Come on, come on.
Not that way, she'll stop us.
Who, that? She's fucking bite sized.
She's wearing my sunglasses.
So?
No, there has to be another way.
Look, that chick is an abused Polly Pocket,
not a ninja.
Besides, she's not the enemy, he is.
No, there has to be...
Fuck.
Finally, a bit of privacy.
And you're right, I did take these.
Wahhh, good catch.
Just in case.
Oh no, I must have left it in the bathroom.
It's the only place I didn't look.
Look, this is why you shouldn't drink, sweetness.
- It makes you so sloppy. - I made that stupid case
specifically so this wouldn't happen.
Hey, hey, hey. I love you, I love you.
It's fine, stop wigging.
It's fine, just chill.
I cannot afford a new phone right now, okay?
- We are dirt broke. - Hey, hey, look at me.
Hey.
Money's gonna come.
Hey.
We are too good to not blow up, right?
You are too good.
All right?
Kiss me.
Kisses.
Fine.
I got you a present.
Are you kidding me?
No.
That was really fucked up, Royal.
You weren't paying any attention to me all night!
- You are an infant. - Well, you're an addict.
- What? - Yep, your phone,
your friends, your drinking.
Just addictive distractions.
- You're my girlfriend. - Baby, come on.
You're supposed to pay attention to me.
I... I was thanking people for coming to our gig.
What people, huh?
The dudes that you invite to our shows
in the hope that they'll fuck you?
- What? - They won't fuck you.
Who else would besides me? You're too weird looking.
Fuck your fucking phone.
I'm right here.
I'm your boyfriend.
You want me to dump you?
Is that what you want?
Send you back to fucking hotel cafe open mics
for the rest of your sad-ass life?
Say the word, it is done.
- Royal, please. - No, you need to remember
that I can upgrade any time.
I've just spent so many hours
making you halfway marketable,
I'd like to maybe see a return on my investment.
Please stop.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I didn't... I don't know why I say...
I'm sorry.
Forgive me?
That was not okay.
It won't happen again, I promise, I...
I'll... I'll call my therapist first thing tomorrow.
- Royal. - Please.
I really, really love you.
I don't know why I say those type of things.
Please, please say you forgive me.
Please say you forgive me.
Please forgive me.
Please.
Of course I forgive you.
We'll work on this together.
I'm sorry.
- It's okay, it's okay. - I'm sorry.
No one will ever love you like I love you.
No one has a heart as big as mine
that's just for you.
Oh, thank God, thank God.
You passed out.
Come on, we gotta get out of here.
- Welcome back. - Get the fuck out
- Of the way, Royal! - Nope!
I was trying to have a private conversation with Val,
but since we're all here,
we're gonna have ourselves a big group conversation,
like a bunch of civilized adults.
Oh, you're an adult?
Hilarious. Move.
You never understood our connection, Julie.
I'm pretty sure you poisoned her against me.
- Oh, I'm the poison? - Val,
I think this chick's in love with you.
- Always has been. - Fuck off, wannabe Eurotrash.
Oh, then why else would she try and convince you
that my romantic gestures were bad?
You're not a romantic, dude.
You're a true crime series waiting to happen.
You tattooed her face on your head.
- Wait, what? - You melted her record collection.
You hid out in the back of her car
and jumped her.
- Is that true? - Of course not.
And this was all after she dumped your ass.
Don't think I've forgotten about all that Looney Tunes shit
you said while you guys were together.
"Someday, sweetness, I'm gonna buy us a mansion
that we won't even live in.
We'll just go there to take turns
ass-fucking each other with our Grammy awards..."
Fuck this.
And forget what I said.
- I don't want your help. - Help?
Here's what's gonna happen.
You're gonna take down every post about me and Trez,
you're gonna stop this pathetic attempt at a comeback,
pack up your keyboard and your ugly friend here,
and you're never gonna play another pop song in your life.
Heard?
Oh yeah?
What if she doesn't?
Jesus fuck!
Oh, come on, it's a video prop.
Um, yeah, but it's really sharp though,
so please be careful.
I'm not gonna use it.
Unless you make me.
- What? - Babe.
No one's making you.
Fine, okay, no one is making me do anything.
I'm trying to own my choices.
Musica, sweetness, musica.
Ooh, what you thinkin', babe?
I don't know, something funky.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Perfect.
Muchas gracias, sweetness.
Welcome.
It's like porn.
The more you dumpster dive like this,
the more fucked up and bizarre your tastes are gonna get.
Well, I'll take my chances with you as my guide.
I'm the only producer I know who hasn't got a vinyl fetish,
so I guess I should probably get one.
Yeah, well, be careful.
My tastes keep getting sicker and sicker.
Almost nothing's weird enough to satisfy.
Oh, yes.
Oh my gosh, it's got instructions.
Are you kidding me?
- You're my good luck charm. - You're my dream girl.
Hey, can you play this for us please?
Yeah, sure.
- Hey you got the address? - Yes, sir.
Oh, let me put some music on.
So, uh, since we're beyond reasonable conversation?
It's up to me to solve the problem.
What is the problem exactly?
It's that you...
... look a lot like her.
Right?
Old photos of you look
a little like new pictures of her.
So you think, "Stole my look".
Never mind it's all my design.
I really don't see the resemblance.
Neither do I.
I spoke to the DJ.
No one has a heart as big as mine,
and it's just for you, belongs to you for always.
I love you, Royal.
You, my sweetness, are simply the sweetest.
So here's the solve.
I could rearrange your face,
that way she's she and you're a whole new you.
Everyone's happy.
Is that a no?
Or you could just remember
that you were nothing before we met
and keep my material out of your mouth.
That'd be my preference.
I hate you.
Hm?
She said she hates you.
- That's not nice. - You're not nice.
I tried to love you, Royal.
I tried really hard.
But you are not a person that can be loved
without destruction.
I don't think he even qualifies as a person anymore.
Maybe he never did.
Don't listen to 'em, babe.
That's just some toxic envy talking.
No one is blaming you, girl,
but you have got to get away from this creep
- as fast as you can. - Sweetness,
can you change this song?
I'm kind of done with it.
Of course!
Whoa, back off, dude.
Hm, no thanks.
Julie.
- What's the mood? - Stop it.
I don't know, something with a little kick to it.
I got you.
Seriously, dude, I will halfway fuck you all the way up.
Just stop.
Don't!
No.
No, no, no.
No, no.
I didn't mean to.
Just breathe.
No, Julie, it's okay, it's okay.
Wow.
I'm gonna go get help.
Wowie.
Wow.
Trez...
I'll call an ambulance.
Wait.
I mean...
It's too late, right?
I don't know.
Besides...
Aren't you kind of curious to see
what it looks like when someone dies?
Somebody help!
Help, help, please!
I don't wanna break up.
Well, if we are staying together,
you better read that book.
Deal.
Are you sure you don't feel trapped?
Wait, hang on.
What?
Did you hear something?
Thought I heard something.
No.
- You didn't hear anything. - Okay.
Fuck.
Just watch, okay?
This is a big moment and you're not even looking.
We should... we should really call an ambulance.
It's too late for that.
- Playlist? - Shuffled.
Wow, psychic shuffle.
Well done, DJ algorithm.
You know, we should do a remix with these guys.
Reach out to 'em.
A sort of chill house vibe for Treasure Me'd be dope.
Julie thinks it's a good idea.
Does it, um,
does it always take this long?
You think I know how long it takes people to bleed out?
I was just asking.
Let's just watch.
- Oh. - What are you doing?
I just want to listen.
Incredible.
Just incredible.
Fuck!
Agh, fuck.
Fuck, fuck it, fuckin' fuck.
Agh!
What's wrong, babe?
I should have recorded it.
I'm serious.
You don't think it would be amazing
to have a recording of someone's last breath?
You want a next-level sample,
that's the fucking business right there.
Yeah, I... I guess.
Next time.
- Babe? - Hm?
We're gonna play Glastonbury in like two days, right?
That's the plan.
Is that even possible now?
I'm not following.
How are we gonna deal with her?
Not our problem.
That was your knife, and now she...
Hey, sweetness.
I mean, come on.
That was an accident.
- It didn't look like... - You weren't watching.
She came at me at a weird angle,
basically ran into the knife.
That was an accident.
I swear.
An accident.
You do not need to stress about this.
A whole plan came into my head, bing, bang, boom.
The minute it happened.
I'll tell the police the whole thing.
We've got three witnesses who are on our side.
- Babe, those are fans... - This is why we have a legal team.
For situations exactly like this.
Hey...
You know, this might sound wild,
but, uh, I think we could benefit from this.
This could be a big win for us.
As strange as it seems,
this here is justice, plain and simple.
Unless I'm really confused,
I don't think that that girl was the problem.
These women were both trying to destroy us.
And we're one step closer
to being safe and free.
Babe, you said
that you were gonna come talk to Valentine,
- and now we have this... - Oh, how do you know
what I said?
- You don't listen. - That's... I promise.
You promise what, hm?
You promised to stay in the car,
and yet here you are.
After all I've done, you could at least listen.
Babe.
That hurts.
Oh, fuck.
Please bring Val back in here for me.
It's getting late and you need your beauty sleep.
You're looking really tired lately.
9-1-1, what's your emergency?
If someone's there,
can you make a noise or tap your phone
to confirm you need help?
I'm calling to report a possible...
Sir?
Sir, please state the nature of your emergency.
Sir?
Hello, sir, are you there?
Hello in there?
Are you making a phone call?
♪ In the dark I feel you ♪
♪ One more breath, everything could change ♪
♪ And all my heart has been through ♪
♪ Black and blue, black and blue, baby ♪
♪ This could get messy ♪
♪ I feel the earth shaking me ♪
♪ And now we're running full speed, full speed ♪
♪ Never good timing, a perfect emergency ♪
♪ I'm ready for the real thing ♪
♪ Real thing, edge of the knife ♪
♪ We're dancing with danger ♪
♪ I feel our blood collide ♪
♪ Electrified ♪
♪ My soul is rearranging ♪
♪ Cross my heart, hope to die ♪
♪ I'll dance with you on the knife ♪
♪ Answer, baby, I can barely speak ♪
♪ True love hurts, ♪
♪ But we have destiny on our side ♪
♪ Edge of the knife ♪
♪ We're dancing with danger ♪
♪ I feel our blood collide ♪
♪ Electrified ♪
♪ My soul is rearranging ♪
♪ Cross my heart, hope to die ♪
♪ I'll dance with you on the knife ♪
Look who stuck the fuck around,
you sexy little sneak.
I... I... I...
I'm a huge liar?
You know, I really don't like it
when people lie to me.
It breaks the social contract, you know?
- Royal... - No, I know what you're gonna say.
Some lying is necessary in this life,
and you're right.
But not in an exchange as beautifully simple
as ours was, no way, just unacceptable.
- I swear I wasn't gonna... - It won't fly.
You can't take advantage of a guy like me,
I have too much self-respect.
- I couldn't just leave... - Deal's a deal, bud.
This cowering in the corner, calling the cops on me,
that was not the deal.
I don't want any trouble.
I'm gonna have to argue with you on that one,
because it kinda seems like you're asking for trouble.
I promise, I swear, I will leave right now
and I won't say a goddamned word to anyone.
I know that.
I'm just waiting to hear what type of apology
you're gonna cook up for me.
That way, I'll make sure that you never tell
another lie again.
The world doesn't need another liar.
- Please. - No.
- Please! - No, no... no!
We are not doing begging or bargaining.
We're doing just this.
This is destiny in action.
Oh!
Are we gonna have a fight?
I don't wanna hurt you.
I'm the one with the knife.
We could leave... together, right now.
Why would I leave with you?
Because we are both his victims.
Yuck. I am not a victim.
Does he hit you?
No.
When you're fooling around, even?
Spank you too hard?
Test your boundaries? Choke you till you pass out?
Look. He told me how toxic everything got
between you guys.
You pretend like you're into it, right?
You even say, "Yeah, I'm into that kind of thing".
You can't kink-shame me.
You ignore the fact that he can't even get it up
if you're enjoying yourself.
He's on a better path now, Valentine.
Royal is as devoted to his healing
as he is to our music.
You're about to step in my dead friend's blood.
Does that shit look like healing to you?
Look. It took me a long time
to confront the reality of what he is
and what he did to me.
You should try taking the responsibility
- for your own decisions. - I understand you can't
get there right this minute, you're too deep in it.
He is the love of my life,
and you're not gonna use your crazy
to turn me against him.
Trezzure, if we don't get out of here right now,
we are both gonna wind up like Julie tonight.
That was an accident.
Truce, okay?
Temporary, five minutes.
Not a chance.
If you leave with me,
I will never play those songs... my songs... ever again.
Liar.
Christ almighty, girl, what do you have to lose
except your life?
Let's go.
Please.
You don't need him.
I am done with this conversation.
Fine.
But no one will ever love you
like I love you.
No one has a heart as big as mine.
It's just for you.
It belongs to you for always.
It's a routine.
It's lines, it's lies.
When he is done sucking the life out of you...
You don't know squat about us
or what we've been through together.
You won't know how to exist without him.
You won't even remember who you are.
I know exactly who I am.
Really?
'Cause you look like a photocopy of me.
The hair.
That your idea or his?
- Ours. - The songs.
Ours.
How much weight have you lost since you two got together?
Jeez, Trez, you been eating carbs again?
Thought you said you were gonna lay off.
You don't know what it's like being on camera.
Does he take food out of your hands?
- Wow. - Tell you what to eat,
what you can drink or not drink?
The answer's yes.
I know it 'cause I lived it.
I mean, you can justify it all day,
it was a bit, an accident,
a bad mood, but it is none of those things,
it is the real him.
I didn't think we should come here.
Royal said it would be easier for you
if we asked you politely to stop.
Did he mention the part where he wants my help
writing your second album?
Yeah.
That was my vibe on it too.
Look.
I believe in doing the difficult thing
when it's the right thing.
I believe in forgiveness,
even for someone as messed up as you.
But you need to stop lying.
To me, but more importantly, to yourself.
I feel sorry for you.
I really do.
But if you don't stop playing our songs,
we'll sue you.
And our people will bury you in court.
Royal is trying to bury my body tonight!
Well, maybe that's your fault.
You're right.
You know what? It probably is,
it's for sure my fault for not seeing him
for what he was before he registered
every song I ever wrote in his name.
I think that you're a jealous, manipulative nut job
who couldn't see how good she had it.
I'm sorry things didn't pay off quick enough
- for you to stick it out... - Oh my God, listen to yourself!
I'm smarter than you!
I see what's good for me.
It's the man that chose me
and built a career with me.
He recreated me on your body.
You need some serious therapy.
♪ In the dark I feel you ♪
♪ One more breath, everything could change ♪
♪ You know my heart has been through ♪
♪ Black and blue, black and blue, babe ♪
♪ This could get messy, ♪
♪ I feel the earth shaking me ♪
♪ And now we're running full speed, ♪
♪ Full speed ♪
♪ Never good timing, a perfect emergency ♪
♪ I'm ready for the real thing, ♪
♪ Real thing, edge of the knife ♪
♪ We're dancing with danger ♪
♪ I feel our blood collide ♪
♪ Electrified ♪
♪ My soul is rearranging ♪
♪ Cross my heart, hope to die ♪
♪ I'll dance with you on the knife ♪
Babe?
Oh! Oh, sweetness.
Hey, look inside.
- Oh my God, your arm! - No, no, no, I'm fine,
I'm fine... look, look, look, look, look, look!
Oh my God.
You know how in the movies, it kind of sprays?
Well, this one actually did!
Hey, did you and I watch Titus Andronicus,
or was that me and Val?
Oh, fuck!
Don't you die on me!
Bam!
That's gonna be priceless someday.
It can be a helpful exercise
to thank the you of the past
for giving the present you an opportunity
to love yourself first.
Put your hand on your heart center.
Repeat after me:
Thank you for giving me the chance to love myself.
I am forever grateful.
If you're enjoying Coda-cast,
please subscribe and leave us a review.
Hey, girl.
We're honored to be on this journey
of self-discovery with you.
- Rough night? - Sure, yeah.
Rough night number 900 and something?
Ooh. We're gonna need to get you, like,
19 Band-Aids for that hand, huh?
Probably.
Jules.
I think I'm ready.
I'm done punishing myself.
So I couldn't make the world's
most fucked-up relationship work,
so what?
I wanna play my music again.
Is that crazy?
No!
Are you kidding? Not at all.
Dude, I am so proud of you,
and I am so here for this.
Valentine Fawkes,
you got this.
How can I survive? How can I ever feel safe again?
You have the right to love yourself first.
Break free of the prison of enmeshment.
Feel like annihilation.
Hey, sweetness, what's wrong?
There is a corkscrew in your arm...
- I promise I'm fine. - ... and another dead person
in this bar!
Well, I was taken advantage of!
This was your plan the whole time, wasn't it?
What do you mean?
This!
Of course not!
This was self-defense!
Oh, I see it all now.
Okay, all right...
Speak up, you're mumbling again.
I'm sorry,
but I can't be part of this.
Hey... hey, hey.
Don't use words like that!
It's gonna be okay.
I'm really sorry, but I have to go.
Absolutely not!
We are a team.
You can't just leave.
I did that for us... for you!
You basically made me do that.
- What? - Seriously.
Don't be mean to me.
That's not mean, that's honest.
You can't just tell someone they have a weak chin.
It's fine, I asked.
I got the real answer.
I gotta live with it.
Who's there?
It's me!
Hi.
"It's me!"
Crazy bitch.
No, no, no, Royal said I could leave!
Please, please, no!
You don't understand!
Fuck!
If you want breakthroughs,
you have to break your patterns.
Your trauma is a gateway,
a path, a staircase to purpose.
You are responsible for you.
Your resilience brought you this far,
but now you can begin to observe how
your triggers are in fact your teachers.
Because you're murdering people!
You're a real-life murderer!
How can you say that to me?
Self-defense!
Self-fucking-defense!
Are you gonna kill her too?
Why the fuck would I do that?
Please, just tell me the truth.
- I can't take this anymore. - You can't take anything.
You've always been weak.
I have to do everything for us, don't I? Everything.
It's disgusting, your weakness,
it just disgusts me!
She's why we're not recording it,
isn't she?
You're waiting for her.
The new stuff sucks, Trez.
It sucks.
If you came to me with good material, maybe.
You said that it was getting there.
But I guess it's not.
I guess I'm just her stand-in.
First, I wanna kill her;
now I like her more than you?
I just want the truth!
Now, look, I am not indulging
this crybaby routine for one second longer.
This is not being a good partner, you hear me?
Yeah, you're being super manipulative right now.
Hey, look, I need you to buck up,
stop your sniveling,
and get this thing out of me.
Ow! Gentle!
Gentle.
Okay, go, go.
Mm, mm...
Ooh!
- Ohh... - If you puke on me,
maybe I'll kill you next, huh?
Triple murder, because I'm this real big murderer, right?
Waking up to really see yourself
is the most terrifying part of this work.
To break away from trauma bonds
requires the bravery to look within and acknowledge
the ugliest things about yourself and your attachments.
Nothing.
Bummer!
Did you check the dressing room?
Mm-hm.
- You sure? - Mm-hm.
Look at me.
Where would you go
if you were my Valentine?
Hi, sweetness.
You're always leaving me.
You know how much that hurts to be without you?
It hurts me.
You're so mean to me, so fucking mean to me. Why?
Oh baby. Baby, I'm coming. I'm coming. Please.
Welcome back.
Ooh... ooh, watch out for that step, kiddo!
Haven't been too graceful, have you?
Guess we'll have to get you into some dance classes
to tighten up that little potbelly of yours.
This is great!
Huh? Isn't this great?
Finally a moment with me and my girl.
♪ My girls... ♪
What do you want with me, Royal?
Come again?
What do you want with me?
Hm?
You... you want me to disappear forever?
Why would I want that?
You want me to die?
No.
I think you do.
I don't, that's not...
What are you waiting for?
Uh, my consent?
You have it.
I consent, okay?
Just kill me, get it over with.
Stop it, I don't like it.
Aww, Royal!
Baby!
Just do what you came here to do, okay?
I want it.
Give it to me.
Why are you being so mean to me?
Oh my God!
Mean, mean.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right, that's me.
That's me, the big meanie!
- Stop it! - No, no, no, no, no.
No.
You don't get it.
I'm not afraid of you and your psycho bullshit anymore.
You know what?
You took my life away once, baby.
Just take it again, okay?
Do it again.
For real this time.
Please, stop!
If you want me dead, fucking bring it on.
Don't bitch out on me now!
Come on.
You know what?
I... I welcome the chance to never think of you
ever, ever again.
Death? Death sounds like a fucking vacation
from the hell that you have made for me in this world.
You left me!
Remember?
You broke my heart!
Aww, Royal!
I cordially invite you to suck
the biggest possible bag of dicks.
I mean, surplus size.
There is not enough therapy,
guided meditation, or future-self-fucking journaling
in this world to fix even one quarter
of what you broke in me.
I'm fucking broken, dude.
You won.
You killed my last ally, so...
just hurry it up and kill me.
I don't wanna kill you! God!
I mean, I...
I came here to, you know, ask you for a little help.
Good fucking job!
- Bravo! - Shut up.
Just shut the fuck up.
Shut up.
Guess you're...
when I think about it...
I just want you.
I want you back!
What?
Let's get back together, Val.
Don't fucking laugh at me, I'll fucking kill you.
No, I love you... hey, no.
We are destined to be together.
You're just gonna touch me, huh, like you own me?
You're the fucking devil, you know that?
Listen, listen.
She is not half the woman you are.
I just... I just worked with what I could get, you know?
She's garbage compared to you, I mean, really.
I told you!
Hey, hey, hey, hey. Let's start over, okay?
You and me, let's start over. All right?
All that I ever wanted was for you to come back
and apologize for hurting my feelings, you know?
But I see it, I see it,
I see it now, you are so sorry.
Yeah, I'm the sorriest girl in Los Angeles
since the day we met.
Yeah. And you know what?
You don't have to worry about Trezzure
or anything anymore.
You know why?
Because you're right.
She stole everything that belongs to you,
and it's high time that you got the relationship
and the life that you deserve.
You know what?
You're not wrong about that.
Shockingly not wrong.
Yeah. We could play Glastonbury this weekend.
Huh? You and me?
Finally...
fulfilling our destiny.
Huh?
I think maybe they closed early.
Hey, man, we wanted to use our drink...
tickets?
Can I help you?
Hey, we're just gonna head back.
Yeah, we didn't mean to interrupt.
It's fine.
Hey, look, I'm sorry you have to go like this,
- it's not my preference. - Hey, stop!
What are you doing?!
You interrupted a private moment!
Let us out! Help!
It's bad timing on your part, man.
You're a musician, right?
Guitarist, huh?
Guitarists are supposed to be better listeners.
That was some very bad listening.
Shh!
Relax, relax, relax.
A little advice from one pro to another?
Gotta learn how to read a room!
It's crucial.
Nick, fuck!
Take it... easy!
Just relax, that's it.
Trez, will you get her back in here for me now?
I can do this if you'd rather not.
I've got it, babe!
No problem!
Hey, get me a towel while you're at it.
Sweetness?
Which sweetness did you mean?
Her...
or me?
Put that down.
Okay.
I am...
breaking...
up with...
you!
Holy...
Wow.
Yeah.
Wowie.
- Where are you... - Gotta puke.
Considerate of you to use the bathroom
after all this.
Oh, oh, oh... hey, hey, hey, okay,
okay, come here.
There there, friend.
He's gone now.
Which means that you can go ahead
and take the slander about me stealing your act
off of your social media before I sue you.
I'm sorry?
Oh.
I just want to be super clear.
You... you were right about him.
But that's no reason to punish me!
Are you... are you gonna get a different look?
Different songs?
Why would I do that?
Because they're mine.
We're not best friends just 'cause the same guy screwed us.
Even those are mine!
Okay, crazy, listen.
I worked hard for my success, and...
No. That success isn't yours.
He took it from me.
We took it.
What?
It's not my problem that I did your thing
better than you.
Give me back my fucking sunglasses.
Oh, come on.
Are you kidding?
My sunglasses.
My face.
My songs.
♪ If you get with me, I will be what you need ♪
♪ Yeah, I'll treasure you ♪
Thank you for giving me the chance
to love myself.
I am forever grateful.
Thank you, friends!
I am so glad that you all could make it
to this super special secret show,
just for my most super special fans.
I am just totally in love with all of you!
And here's a crazy thing about being in love:
Sometimes, in love,
we start to betray our true selves
to become more desirable.
To become what we think the other person wants most.
But that isn't real love.
Real love is being your most authentic,
honest self.
And I am ready to be my authentic self
with every single one of you from now on.
Not a character,
not a product,
but the real me.
The original me.
Would you guys like to hear a brand-new track?
♪ I am electric tonight ♪
♪ Feel like myself for the first time ♪
♪ I'm breaking up with their lies ♪
♪ And it feels so nice ♪
♪ Don't tell me I should keep quiet ♪
♪ Why would I hide when I could shine? ♪
♪ Well, then I guess I took mine,
I took it back ♪
♪ I took it back, took it back ♪
♪ Took it all ♪
♪ Oh, now that I'm finally back in focus ♪
♪ Oh, you know, now I can be me ♪
♪ The smoke heavy, lifted to clarity ♪
♪ I'm sharper than they remember ♪
♪ Oh, oh, ohh ♪
♪ Now that I'm finally back here for good ♪
♪ I am free ♪
♪ The air is crystallizing ♪
♪ All of the shadows are dancing ♪
♪ Fill up the room when we sing ♪
♪ Intoxicate me ♪
♪ I used to terror in dreams ♪
♪ Oh, I hid away from the real thing ♪
♪ But now I finally see ♪
♪ I took it back ♪
♪ Yeah, I took it back ♪
♪ Took it back, took it, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, now that I'm finally back in focus ♪
♪ Oh, you know, now I can be me ♪
♪ The smoke heavy, lifted to clarity ♪
♪ I'm sharper than they remember ♪
♪ Oh, oh, ohh ♪
♪ Now that I'm finally back in focus ♪
♪ I am free ♪
♪ Give me a reason, I don't believe them ♪
♪ Here in my own skin, love will win, love will win ♪
♪ Give me a reason why I should give in ♪
♪ Here in my own skin, love will win ♪
♪ I am electric tonight ♪
♪ Feel like myself for the first time ♪
♪ Oh, oh, now that I'm finally back in focus ♪
♪ Oh, you know, now I can be me ♪
♪ The smoke heavy, lifted to clarity ♪
♪ I'm sharper than they remember ♪
♪ Oh, oh, ohh ♪
♪ Oh, now that I'm finally back in focus ♪
♪ I am free ♪
♪ Who is that girl painting stars in the sky? ♪
♪ That's you ♪
♪ Diamonds and pearls, ♪
♪ She could shipwreck your eyes ♪
♪ Into ♪
♪ I'm not one to compromise, but you could fantasize ♪
♪ Every night you do ♪
♪ Baby ♪
♪ If you treasure me, I'll treasure you ♪
♪ I'll be the centerpiece inside your room ♪
♪ We'll decorate the world in baby blue ♪
♪ Blue, blue ♪
♪ Baby ♪
♪ If you treasure me, I'll treasure you ♪
♪ We'll sail the seven seas and trenches too ♪
♪ Even though my body's calling out for you ♪
♪ You, you ♪
♪ Who is that girl in your wildest dreams? ♪
♪ Well, you ♪
♪ I'll fill up your world, watching me from the screen ♪
♪ You know you do ♪
♪ I'm not one to compromise, but you could fantasize ♪
♪ Every night you do ♪
♪ Baby ♪
♪ If you treasure me, I'll treasure you ♪
♪ I'll be the centerpiece inside your room ♪
♪ We'll decorate the world in baby blue ♪
What if she just went totally ape shit
and like...
Murdered everyone.
♪ Baby ♪
♪ If you treasure me, I'll treasure you ♪
♪ We'll sail the seven seas and trenches too ♪
♪ You know my body's calling out for you ♪
♪ You, you ♪
♪ If you get with me, I will be what you need ♪
♪ Yeah, I'll treasure you ♪
♪ Treat me like I'm royalty, royalty, royalty ♪
♪ Come on, baby ♪
♪ I know what you need, what you need, yeah, it's me ♪
♪ I'ma treasure you ♪
♪ Treasure me ♪
Hi, friends!
♪ Oh, oh, oh, ohh ♪
♪ Baby ♪
♪ If you treasure me, I'll treasure you ♪
♪ I'll be the centerpiece inside your room ♪
Acting!
♪ We'll decorate the world in baby blue ♪
♪ Blue, blue ♪
♪ Baby ♪
Oh my God!
♪ We'll sail the seven seas and trenches too ♪
♪ You know my body's calling out for you ♪
Put that down.
Cut.
Cut!
How the fuck was that?
- Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com -