[ Monica ]: Mmm, mmm, mmm.
This cake is amazing. Mmm.
My God, get a room.
Mmm. I would get a room with this cake.
I think I could show this cake a good time.
If you had to, what would you give up...food or sex?
Sex.
Seriously, answer faster.
Oh, I'm sorry, honey.
No, when she said "sex," I wasn't thinking about sex with you, heh.
It's like a giant hug.
Ross, how 'bout you? Which would you give up...sex or food?
- Food. - Okay, how 'bout, um, sex or dinosaurs?
[ Emma laughs ]
Oh, my God. It's like "Sophie's Choice."
Oh, God.
What about you, Joe? What would you give up...sex or food?
Uh...ooh...uh.
I don't know. It's too hard.
No, you got to pick one.
[ Joey sighs ]
Uh...food. No, sex.
Food. Sex. Food. Se... I don't know. Oh, God, I want both.
I want...I want girls on bread.
Sync by chocomoon www.addic7ed.com
{an8}♪ So no one told you life was going to be this way ♪
{an8}♪ Your job's a joke, you're broke ♪
{an8}♪ Your love life's D.O.A. ♪
{an8}♪ It's like you're always stuck in second gear ♪
{an8}♪ When it hasn't been your day, your week ♪
{an8}♪ Your month, or even your year ♪
{an8}♪ But I'll be there for you ♪
{an8}♪ 'Cause you're there for me, too ♪
{an8}Okay, you've got to see these latest pictures of Emma.
{an8}Oh, how cute.
{an8}- Oh, she looks just like a little doll. - Oh, no, no. That is a doll.
{an8}Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy.
{an8}[ Rachel ]: Yeah.
{an8}[ Rachel chuckles ]
{an8}[ Phoebe ]: Look, there's Chandler.
{an8}[ Rachel ]: Oh. Who's the blonde? She's pretty.
{an8}[ Phoebe gasps ]
{an8}He's having an affair.
{an8}He is not having an affair.
{an8}You know I'm always right about these things.
{an8}No, you're not. Last week, you thought Ross was trying to kill you.
{an8}Well, I'm sorry, but it's hard to believe that anyone would tell a story that dull
{an8}just to tell it.
{an8}[ inaudible dialogue ]
{an8}I swear there's something going on with them.
{an8}Look. He's getting into the car with her.
{an8}[ Rachel ]: Oh, that doesn't mean anything.
{an8}Oh, yeah? Well, let's see.
{an8}Huh?
{an8}- Okay, duck down. - Oh.
{an8}[ line dials ] [ phone ringing ]
{an8}- Hello? - Oh, hi, Chandler, it's Phoebe.
{an8}Um, I know that Monica is working today,
{an8}so I was wondering if you wanted to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
{an8}Oh, uh...I have to work, too. Yeah, I'm stuck here at the office all day.
Uh, well, it's a shame that you'll, that you'll miss the movie
'cause we were going to see, you know, either, um, "Liar Liar" or, um...
"Betrayal" or "An Affair to Remember."
Those are all really old.
Okay, then maybe it'll be, um...
"Dude, Where's My Car?"
- What? - They're in a car.
Okay, well, all right, talk to you later, okay? Bye.
Sheesh!
Okay, quick. We got to find a cab and follow them.
Oh, yeah, okay,
let me just grab my night-vision goggles and my stun gun. Heh.
I got 'em.
- Hey. - Hey. Hey, sweetie.
Hey, you smell like perfume and cigarettes.
- I was in the car with Nancy all day. - Nancy doesn't smoke.
Well, at least the perfume's not mine. Be thankful for that.
So? What did you think of the house?
It's perfect. It's everything we've been looking for.
Isn't it? And what about the, the amazing wainscoting,
and the crown molding, and the dormer windows in the attic?
And the wigglewoms and the zipzorps?
What were the things you said?
- Don't you love the huge yard? - And the fireplace in the bedroom.
And Nancy said it's really underpriced,
because the guy lost his job and has to move in with his parents.
This is bringing out a lovely color in you.
So...do you think we should get it?
I don't know. What do you think?
- I think we should. - I do, too.
- This is huge. - I know.
How bad do you want to smoke right now?
I don't know what you mean... giant, talking cigarette.
Oh, by the way, Phoebe called just as I was getting into Nancy's car,
so if she asks you, I was at work all day.
Got you. When do we tell them about this?
We don't. Not until it's a hundred percent. Why upset everybody over nothing?
Okay. Right.
- Oh, my God, that is going to be so hard. - I know. Good luck with it.
I just can't see Chandler cheating.
I'm telling you guys, we followed them out to a house in Westchester.
They went in for like 45 minutes, and then they came out looking pretty happy.
- Chandler? - [ Rachel ]: Mm-hmm.
Forty-five minutes?
Well, something's not right.
I just can't believe he would do this to Monica.
I know, and, and with the baby coming?
- So, should we tell her? - [ Ross ]: I don't know.
Phoebe, if, if one of us saw Mike with another woman,
would you want us to tell you?
Why, who'd you see him with?
- No one. I'm just saying, if we did... - Tell me what you know!
[ shrieking ]
Ow. No one, nothing. Mike's a great guy. It was hypothetical.
All right. He is a good guy.
You're right. He wouldn't cheat.
Believe me, if I did see him with someone, there's no way I...
Who did you see him with?!
[ shrieking ]
[ humming ]
Oh, look at her. So happy.
If only there were a smaller one to clean this one.
Hey, is, uh, is...is Chandler here?
No, he's picking up dinner. Why, what's up?
Well...
Look, whatever happens, we're here for you, and we love you.
All right.
We think Chandler might be having an affair.
- What? - Phoebe and I saw Chandler
with a blonde woman today outside on the street,
and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
They went in together. I'm so sorry.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God, that's awful.
[ sighs ]
What did you think of the house?
What?
Monica, you understand what we're saying, right?
Yeah. Sure. I mean, I'm devastated, obviously.
Did you think the neighborhood was homey?
- All right. - You son of a bitch.
Is it me, or have the greetings gone downhill around here?
Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today,
and, um, they think you're having an affair.
- Monica, who's Nancy? - What's going on?
Uh...
okay, uh...
all right, guys, you better sit down.
- This is, this is pretty big. - Yeah.
I'm not having an affair.
Nancy...is our realtor.
I knew he couldn't be with a woman for 45 minutes!
[ laughs ] I knew it. I knew it.
Why...w-why do you have a realtor?
Um...she's been showing us houses outside of the city.
- What? - Are you serious?
When we found out that we were going to get this baby,
Chandler and I started talking and we decided
that we didn't want to raise a kid in the city.
So you're, so you're going to move?
Oh, my God.
Shouldn't we all vote on stuff like this?
What is wrong with raising a kid in the city?
I'm doing it. Ross is doing it.
Sarah Jessica Parker is doing it.
And that's great for you guys, but we want a lawn and a swing set.
And a street where our kids can ride their bikes,
and maybe an ice cream truck can go by.
So you want to buy a house in the '50s.
[ Phoebe ]: Have you thought about what you're giving up?
You can't move out of the city. What if...?
What if you want Chinese food at 5 a.m.?
Or a fake Rolex that breaks as soon as it rains?
Or an Asian hooker sent right to your door?
[ Ross ]: You know what? If you want to look for a house, that's okay.
No, no, it's not. Don't listen to him. I'm going to thump you.
It's okay, because they have to get it out of their system.
Okay? But, you're going to realize, this is the only place you want to be.
Actually...
we already found a house we love.
- What? - And about an hour ago, we made an offer.
Bet you wish I was having an affair now, huh?
- You put an offer on a house? - It's so sweet.
It really is. It has this big yard that leads down to this stream.
And then there's these old maple trees.
Oh, again with the nature! What are you, beavers?
Look, I know this is really hard, and we're really sorry.
Is this because I come over here without knocking and eat your food?
Because I can stop doing that.
I...I really, really think I can.
You know that's not the reason, Joe.
[ Joey sniffs ]
[ Monica ]: I think if you saw it, you'd understand.
I mean, you guys were there. It's...it's beautiful, isn't it?
[ Rachel's foot thumps ]
- Yeah, it is. - What the hell are you doing?!
Well...it is, all right? When we were out there today, all I kept thinking was,
"I can't believe Chandler is screwing this woman,
but, man, this would be a nice place to live!"
Yeah, but so is this.
Yeah, I mean, if you move there, you have to leave here.
I mean, how can you leave this place?
Come on, Daddy, listen to me!
It's like all of my life, everyone has always told me, "You're a shoe!
You're a shoe, you're a shoe. You're a shoe!"
And then today, I just stopped and I said, "What if I don't want to be a shoe?
What if I want to be a...a purse?" You know?
"Or...or...or a hat?"
No, I don't want you to buy me a hat. I'm saying that I am a hat...
it's a metaphor, Daddy!
You can see where he'd have trouble.
Well, maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica.
Your money's mine, Green.
Your fly is open, Geller.
[ Phoebe ]: Oh, you know what I just realized?
"Joker" is "poker" with a "J."
Coincidence?
Hey, that's "jo-incidence" with a "C."
Ooh, look! Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles.
[ all ]: Ew!
[ all gasping ] Oh!
Ooh. That had to hurt.
[ guys groaning ] Aw...
Hey, it's your Thanksgiving, too,
you know, instead of watching football, you could help.
[ in unison ] We know.
Rachel, you want to put the marshmallows in concentric circles.
No, Mon, you want to put them in concentric circles.
I want to do this.
Every year.
[ Joey grunts ]
[ Phoebe gasps ]
[ Joey ]: It's stuck!
[ Phoebe ]: Well...
step...how did it get on?!
I put it on to scare Chandler.
Oh, my God! Monica's going to totally freak out!
Plus, it smells really bad in here.
Yeah, of course it smells bad. You have your head inside a turkey's ass.
Ooh, ooh! Monica.
Oh!
Hey, did you get the turkey...? Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Who is that?
[ Joey ]: It's Joey!
I got it.
How 'bout, if we win, they have to get rid of the rooster.
Ooh, that's interesting.
If you win,
- we give up the bird. - [ shudders ] Aah!
But if we win...
we get your apartment.
Ooh!
- [ Rachel scoffs ] - [ Joey ]: Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
- Deal! - Wha...? What?!
"What was Monica's nickname when she was a field hockey goalie?"
- Big Fat Goalie. - Correct.
"Rachel claims this is her favorite movie."
- "Dangerous Liaisons." - [ Ross ]: Correct.
- "Her actual favorite movie is?" - "Weekend at Bernie's."
[ Ross ]: Correct.
"Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there?"
- Okay, Everyday Use. - Fancy.
- Guest. - Fancy Guest.
- Two seconds. - Ah...eleven?!
[ timer beeps ]
Eleven, unbelievable. Eleven is correct.
- Yes! - [ Joey cackles ]: Ha-ha-ha.
"Chandler was how old when he first touched a girl's breast?"
- Fourteen? - No, 19.
Thanks, man.
"Joey had an imaginary childhood friend.
His name was?"
- Maurice. - [ Ross ]: Correct.
- "His profession was?" - Oh, space cowboy!
[ Ross ]: Correct.
"What is Chandler Bing's job?"
Uh...oh...
oh, gosh.
Ten seconds. You need this, or you lose the game.
- Oh! - It's, um...it has something
to do with transponding...
Oh, oh, oh, he's a transpons...transponster!
That's not even a word!
- Oh! - No, I...I...
Oh, my...
- Oh, my God. - Nooooo...!
Whoo!
[ chuckles ]
[ Rachel ]: You know what? You are mean boys who are just being mean.
Hey, don't get mad at us. No one forced you to raise the stakes.
That is not true. She did. She forced me.
Hey, we'd still be living here, if you hadn't gotten the question wrong.
Well, it was a stupid, unfair question!
Don't blame the questions.
Would you all stop yelling in our apartment?
You are ruining moving day for us.
Chandler!
Chandler! I saw what you were doing through the window!
I saw what you were doing to my sister. Now, get out here!
Well, listen, we had a good run.
You know, what was it? Four, five months?
I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime,
so good-bye, take care, bye-bye, then.
Hey, Ross. What's up, bro?
What...the hell are you doing?!
Hey, wh-what's going on?
Well, I think...I think...Ross knows about me and Monica.
[ half-whispers ]: Dude, he's right there...
I thought you were my best friend. This is my sister.
My best friend and my sister... I...I cannot believe this.
Look, we're not just messing around. I love her,
okay? I'm in love with her.
I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way.
I'm sorry, but it's true. I...I love him, too.
My best friend and my sister!
I cannot believe this!
Well, this is the last box of your clothes.
I'm just going to label it "What were you thinking?"
Funny, 'cause I was just going to go across the hall and write that on Chandler.
Okay, you guys, I don't mean to make things worse, but, um...
I don't want to live with Rachel anymore.
- [ both ]: What?! - You're just so mean to each other.
And I don't want to end up like that with Rachel. I still like you.
Well, Phoebe, that's fine, because I'm not moving.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Phoebe, you got to take her.
You know, I know I said some really bad stuff about her,
but you know, Rachel does have some good qualities that make her a good roommate.
She gets tons of catalogs.
And, um, she'll fold down the pages of the
things that she thinks that I'd like.
- What else? - Well...
when I take a shower,
she leaves me little notes on the mirror.
Yeah, I do. I do do that.
That's nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
When I fall asleep on the couch after reading,
she covers me over with a blanket.
Well, you know, I don't want you to be cold.
And...when I told her that I was going to be moving in with Chandler,
she was really supportive.
[ voice breaking ]: You were so great.
You made it so easy.
[ sobbing ]: And now you have to leave...
and I have to live with a boy!
Oh...honey!
Hey.
- She really left. - Yeah, I know.
- Thank you. - No problem, roomie.
Thanks.
- Can I ask you a question? - Sure.
What the hell is that dog doing here?
- A little toast here. Ding-ding-ding. - [ all ]: Mmm.
I know this isn't exactly the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you planned,
but for me, this has been really great, you know?
I think because it didn't involve divorce
or projectile vomiting.
Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail,
or if you guys had been with your family, or if you didn't have...
syphilis and stuff...
we wouldn't be all together, you know?
So, I guess what I'm trying to say
is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.
[ Rachel & Joey ]: That's so sweet.
[ Rachel ]: Thank you...
[ Ross ]: Mmm!
And hey, here's to a lousy Christmas.
And a crappy New Year.
[ all ]: Hear, hear!
You can't move. You just... you just can't.
Rachel's right. This is where you guys belong.
Yeah, you don't want to live in Westchester.
That's like the worst of the Chesters.
[ Ross ]: You know, sometimes, when I'm alone in my apartment, I look over here,
and you guys are just having dinner,
or watching TV or something,
but...it makes me feel better.
And now when I look over, who am I going to see?
The Gottliebs? The Yangs?
They don't make me feel so good.
Yeah, so...so don't move, okay? Just stay here, and...
- maybe close your blinds at night. - Hey.
[ phone rings ]
[ Chandler sighs ]
Hello?
It's Nancy. They responded to our offer.
And?
Yeah...
okay, thanks.
They passed.
They said they wouldn't go a penny under the asking price.
- We can't afford that. - I know.
Well, there you go.
[ Joey ]: I'm really sorry, you guys.
Yeah, I'm sorry, too. I'm even more sorry that phone call didn't come
before I told you about looking through the window.
[ Rachel ]: Yeah, well, we're going to let you be alone.
- You going to be okay? - Yeah, we'll be okay.
I love you guys.
Hey, you know, I'm really sorry I wasn't more supportive before.
Oh, it's okay. We understand.
Yeah, and about this Nancy...
if you're not sleeping with her, should I?
I know there'll be other houses, but I just, uh...
- I loved that one so much. - Yeah.
Well, it's a good thing we got it, then.
- What?! - We got the house!
Oh, my God!
I just didn't want to tell you in front of them.
Oh, my God! We got it? We got the house?!
- We're getting the house! - Oh!
[ Chandler ]: Mmm!
- We're getting a house. - And a baby!
We're growing up.
We sure are.
So, who's going to tell them?
- Not it! - Not it. Damn it!
{an8}- And, Rachel, this is yours. - [ screams ] Aah!
{an8}Why? What are these for?!
{an8}- You'll see. - All right. Everybody open them.
{an8}Okay.
{an8}[ Rachel & Phoebe gasp ]
{an8}Oh, wow, this is so beautiful!
{an8}Oh, these are the ones I was looking at in the store.
{an8}- [ Monica ]: I know. - Oh, I love this.
{an8}A meatball sub!?
{an8}Thanks!
{an8}Seriously, you guys. What's going on? What are these for?
{an8}Well, I didn't know how to tell you before, but...
{an8}- we got the house. - Enjoy!
{an8}What did they say?
{an8}Sync by chocomoon www.addic7ed.com