Have you been in a serious wreck?
Suffered catastrophic damage to your pride and joy?
Well, have no fear.
Dan Balsamo's here.
Family owned and operated for 10 years,
Dan's Auto Collision provides expert craftsmanship
and honest, affordable service.
We treat every vehicle like it was one of our own.
Whether it's the smallest scratch...
or total demolition, I will personally restore your precious baby
to its former glory.
So come see us and let Dan's Auto Collision
get you back on the road and on with your life.
Mr. Strasmore?
Welcome back. The doctor will see you now.
Let's do it.
So, Doc, you're new.
I don't remember seeing you last time I was here.
I'm one of the center's board members, actually.
- 12 years. - Ah. That's impressive.
Still, don't you think I should see Dr. Grodan,
considering he was the one who... who suggested
I take all these tests in the first place?
Dr. Grodan and his wife are on safari.
Good timing.
'Kay, uh, this can wait. Doc, this should wait.
- I think it's best if I see... - I'm the in-house specialist
on neurological disorders.
I've treated hundreds of athletes with brain injuries.
Waiting won't change your results.
'Cause it's bad.
I knew it. It's fucking football.
I mean, you tell somebody to put a helmet on
and run headfirst into another speeding object just like that
and of course this is what you... who does that for a living, let alone for fun?
It's fucking insanity. The whole thing is insane.
You're fine, Mr. Strasmore.
- What do you mean? - No swelling.
No new blood, no old blood, ventricles look healthy.
You have the normal, healthy brain of a 39-year-old man.
So I pass?
Well, there's nothing wrong with you neurologically,
but judging on the symptoms in your file,
the problem is more likely psychological.
Oh, so I pass.
It's not really a pass/fail situation.
Thank you so much, Doc. Get in here.
I mean, it doesn't change the fact that you're still...
Shh.
Just let me enjoy this moment.
Big V, what's up?
I'm stressed, Spence.
Feels like somebody outside watchin' me.
Nobody's watching you, Vernon.
Could've swore I saw a dude in my yard last night.
You didn't see a dude in your hard. It's all in your mind, brother.
You get the pictures back from Mr. Gomez yet?
They should be arriving today.
So you don't know for sure.
Look, we held up our end,
she's gonna hold up her end.
I should be workin' out, Spence,
instead of being locked up in my crib.
Vernon, you are the hardest-working player in the league.
Enjoy a couple of days off.
Lay low. We're gonna have you packed for Dallas
with a brand-new contract in no time.
You awful cheerful today. It's buggin' me out.
Trust me, stressing and worrying about this shit
ain't gonna change a thing, okay?
So put your mind at ease,
and I'm gonna call you when the coast is clear.
All right, Spence.
ScarJo, Rihanna,
Lupita Nyong'o from "12 Years A Slave,"
- Nia Long. - Nia Long?
Oh, from "Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" Nia Long?
- Yeah. - Oh, man, that's throwback.
Well, there's no restrictions on a hit list.
That's the beauty of the game.
All right, well, who rounds out your top five?
Hmm. It's gotta be Michelle.
The... the first lady?
Power, beauty, style, intelligence, and those arms.
Oh, my G... all very seductive qualities.
Man, you are fucked up.
- I'm fucked up? - Yeah, you're fucked up.
- I'm fucked up? - Extremely.
You're the one making gift baskets
to hush up some girls that you brought home from the club.
- It always worked for Jeter. - You ain't Derek Jeter.
You ain't even Derek Fisher.
Those motherfuckers got rings and class.
What, you sayin' I ain't got class?
You got caught pounding ass in a public restroom.
That's some A-Rod shit.
Man, why you always bringing up old stuff, huh?
Kicking a brother while he's down?
Look, you wanna win Bella back,
you're gonna have to change up your whole act.
Do something bold.
I feel you, T.
And, honestly, I'm tired of the lies.
I'm tired of the cheating.
All these gift baskets, a funhouse.
All this crazy shit I get myself into.
You know, it's time I step up.
It's time I start acting like a man.
It's time to take your ass to Bulgari.
Boating, booze and boobs... the holy trinity of fun.
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
Wow.
- Ahem. - Fuckin' Photoshop.
Leave the room.
- What? - You heard me.
- Mr. Anderson... - You think this is funny.
Why don't you go back to your office
and have a nice big fucking laugh?
- I was only... - Better yet, take the rest of the day off.
Go play some tennis, work on your suntan.
Maybe tomorrow we'll see you here.
Would you mind getting the door, please?
This is the way you handle yourself at business functions?
What can I say? I enjoy dancing at weddings and bar mitzvahs
and... corporate events.
It's a fucking fraternity party.
Mr. Anderson, these guys play a very dangerous game
for your entertainment every Sunday.
When they get a shot to let loose, they go big.
Plus, we hooked four big clients because of this party.
I don't care.
If it gets out that Anderson Financial
is sponsoring drug-fueled orgies on my yacht,
institutional clients will jump ship.
It says in the email that you gave this girl
150 grand?
Yeah, paid in full.
May I ask why didn't you deliver it in person like she asked?
- Well, because she's fucking crazy. - Ah.
She has been trying to shake down Vernon Littlefield.
Now she's trying to shake down me.
Trash like this is why I didn't want you here in the first place.
- Joe mentioned that. - Joe is a fucking idiot.
No, Joe's not a fucking idiot.
Joe hired me to bring in big money players,
protect the wealth,
and capitalize on the success of men in a world that,
with all due respect, Mr. Anderson, you don't know anything about
with the exception of when you watch the Red Zone Channel
on your very big fuckin' flat screen.
Monetize my friendships is what Joe's been preaching to me
from the moment I walked in the door,
and I always thought that that came directly from you.
Everything does except the bad shit.
And this is bad shit.
This is the price you pay when you want to do business in my world.
Well, I'm not sure that I want to pay it.
I don't need this office, Spencer.
Just an excuse to get away from my fucking wife a few days every month.
So if you don't go and see this girl in person
and get those pictures back,
I'm gonna shut the whole operation down.
Did I say this before?
I didn't want you here in the first place.
- Fuck Anderson. - Fuck Angie.
Fuck his fucking yacht
and fuck his fucking company!
Fuck her fucking pictures. Fuck her fucking emails.
10 years, man... I've been fucking grinding away
for this arrogant douchebag and he treats us like that?
We could fucking bury him.
We could, we could, but we won't go there.
Things are fucked-up enough as it is.
I'm... I'm fucked!
We're fucked. We are fucked.
Why didn't you just meet with Angie?
I'm calling her now.
It's already over, man.
Vernon's new contract's off the table.
Anderson's not gonna trust us again.
We should bounce.
Start our own fucking shop.
I'm fucking over this shit.
Hi, you've reached Angela.
I'm either busy or avoiding you.
You be the judge.
Dolphins tackle Nick Kovac will undergo surgery today
to stabilize the vertebrae in his back.
Kovac slipped and fell off his deck
while chasing his Pomeranian.
The Dolphins will look to replace the two-time Pro Bowler
before the start of training camp.
- Well, who does? - Bob does.
- What about the spares? - Those were the spares.
Dipshit number 2 lost the originals when he parked the truck.
What's the problem, guys? We got customers waiting.
Look, I gotta get this model off the floor,
the new one on display, and these two knobs lost the keys.
- All right, well, let's push it. - That thing weighs two tons.
- It'll be easy, come on. - Then move it yourself, big man.
I got a Bennie says he can't.
Oh, shit. I'll match that.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, guys.
Uh, customers are watching.
Hundred says he moves it.
Buck-fifty says he can't.
Okay, Charles. Time to shine.
Put this bitch in neutral and get out the way.
Whoo-hoo!
- We're on! - All right!
Now, you can give me a hard count, on two.
Right.
Set.
42 split.
Omaha!
Hey, man, count it off already.
Right. Hut-hut!
Come on. Come on!
- Come on, come on! - You can do it, you can do it!
Ah!
Huh? Huh?
- That's the guy. - Yeah! Yeah!
That's the guy. I told you.
Double or nothing.
You can't get the SUV up the ramp.
Oh, you want to challenge a brother now?
Put your money where your mouth is, slick.
Ooh!
No way you're driving this thing.
And you know your ass can't see.
I can't see shit! Damn.
And I'm gonna get a new color.
If I get a new one, I'll get a new color.
Look at that. Look at this piece.
"What's the time?" "Who gives a fuck? I'm rich."
T, will you chill out? Straighten up, man.
- We're here for Bella. - My bad.
- Bella is your wife? - Uh, no, my girl.
Must be a very special girl.
How long have you been together?
Six years. A few breaks.
- A lot of time on the road. - A lot of temptation.
Remember the honey from Hotlanta, from the Pink Pony?
Yeah, she was, uh... she was earning money for her graduate degree.
Geopolitics.
What about the girl from K.C. with the natties?
She was about 6'1", straight-up corn-fed.
You gotta understand, uh, Bella and I, we got an open thing.
Let's not forget about your teammate's mother.
Sexual rock bottom right there.
We'd better head to the VIP room.
Bust out the heavy artillery.
- This way, gentlemen. - Thank you.
Charles, Charles, Charles!
Ah!
- Let's go, yo. - Go!
All right, 10 more feet. 10 more feet.
Ah!
Haaa!
You know, it feels like she's about to read my fortune.
She about to take your fortune.
Bella's worth every penny.
Anything to your liking, sir?
I like 'em all.
This one.
It's beautiful.
But... but, no. Okay.
- Or this one? - If that's her style.
- This one should do it, then. - All right.
- How much this gonna cost? - $400,000.
What the fuck?! How much did you say?
That beef Wellington was unreal.
Thank you so much. Glad you loved it.
Oh, my God.
I mean, seriously, you should ditch
the whole financial advisor thing
and become a celebrity chef.
You know, that option is actually on the table.
No shit. Your client list is taking a pounding.
I know.
- But I have to tell you... - Mm-hmm.
Vernon, hands down one of the sweetest guys I've ever interviewed.
Yeah, he is.
I mean, when you said he was having problems,
- I just assumed they were financial. - They are financial.
I just paid Angela $150,000 for the entire package of photos.
Otherwise she was gonna go sell them to somebody else.
- 150? - $150,000.
Wow, Deadspin wouldn't pay half of that,
and they eat that shit up with a serving spoon.
That's 'cause it's personal.
Between me and her.
- Ah. - Yeah.
Of course it is.
I mean, why else would she insist on having a meeting with you?
Well, it's not to give me my favorite T-shirt back.
Mm.
She knows how to push my buttons.
Not only the good ones.
So, when was this epic romance with Angela?
Ah, it's a couple of years ago.
Lasted maybe six months.
- We had fun. - Fun for you or fun for you both?
'Cause, you know, there's a difference.
Okay.
Season started and I was on the road a lot.
Then it ended. That's it.
Mm.
Well, hell hath no fury like a stripper scorned.
She was a go-go dancer. She... go-go.
Right, there's... There's a huge difference.
Okay, so this Angela chick... You gaslighted her?
I have no idea what that means.
It means you string her along,
make her feel really special,
and then you slowly drive her nuts
by walling off your emotions and avoiding her.
Wow. Like you did to me.
Still stings, doesn't it?
Yeah, a little bit. Little bit.
Spence, listen.
You cannot go into this meeting with a head full of steam, okay?
This chick is clearly trying to turn the tables on you,
but you are a different man now.
And I never thought I would say that.
But you have made me a believer.
What?
You have actually changed.
Someone's been drinking the Strasmore Kool-Aid.
I have.
You know what? Fuck Angela for using the old you
as an excuse to do a really fucking shitty thing.
Spence, you just need to go there, see her, face the music,
and pray to God she doesn't come at you with a fucking knife.
- Okay. - 'Kay.
Victor, my man.
- Que pasa? - Nothing much, Joe.
Just chillin'. It ain't tax day, is it?
No, no, not even close, but there are a couple things
that I want to review with you while you're in town.
Oh, okay. I'm listening. What's up?
It's better if we do it in person.
Now's not a good time, Joe.
I head out to training camp this afternoon.
Well, then, I'll come to you right now.
Uh, now's really not a good time.
Victor, if you're standing over a dead prostitute,
I will help you hide the body.
You got a sick mind, Joe, you know that?
I just need five minutes, man.
Damn, you got a magic hook or something?
Patience is all a good fisherman requires.
I see Ricky's been putting that to the test.
Pulled his ass out the fire with that Glazer interview.
Ah, Strasmore special.
We got fans calling asking for number 18 jerseys
with "Fuck you, Dad" on the back.
The Magic City loves him.
Yeah, well, what he lacks in grace, he recoups with style.
- He's on the path now, though. - Mm-hmm.
I've been helping him hit the books.
Come game day, he'll be dialed in.
Okay.
- So, uh... - You heard we lost Kovac.
Yes, sir, I did.
You're here to take his job?
If I don't, somebody else will.
A lot of guys come back simply 'cause they got nothing else better to do.
But if you play this game for the wrong reasons,
it gets dangerous real fast.
People get hurt.
Well, I want to compete, Mr. Siefert.
I want to help y'all win ball games.
Most importantly, I want to hit somebody in the motherfuckin' mouth.
Ah! Ah!
Hey, thanks for seeing me, Vic.
No problem, Joe. It sounded urgent, though.
My bread is safe, right?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, no.
Nothing to worry about. Growing every day.
This, uh... This visit's...
It's of a more interpersonal nature.
I feel like our partnership, though brief,
has been fruitful, right?
You've been good to me, Joe.
That's right. I have, I have.
And I want to continue that trend.
- So what's the problem? - No problem.
No problem at all.
I was just thinking, hypothetically...
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Vic, this guy using a lot of big words, man.
I know, man.
Joe, if you got something to say to me, just spit it out.
Okay, okay. All right. I'm sorry.
Ahem.
Here it is.
I've been with Anderson a long time.
Worked my fuckin' ass off.
Powered through some dark days.
And I've forged a new path towards the company's future.
The problem is, the head honcho doesn't seem to appreciate that.
I'd prefer to be somewhere he does.
I'd feel the same way if the Giants didn't show me the love.
- So, if I left Anderson... - Hypothetically.
Hypothetically.
Would you stick with me?
Is Spencer Strasmore a part of this hypothetical situation?
I can't say for sure.
Listen, Joe. I like you, man.
You're a good dude. You've already made me a whole lot of paper.
- Ah. - So if you were to leave Anderson,
- I'd rock with you. - Yes!
That's what I'm talkin' about!
There's just one last thing, though.
Yeah. What? Anything.
Just something to make sure
that you're committed to me long-term.
Absolutely, absolutely.
I swear on my life, Victor Cruz!
Oh, but I'm guessing that's not enough, right?
Hey, you.
Lilies and roses, your favorite.
- Thank you. - You're welcome.
Look, Bella, I'm sorry I lost my head, okay?
I'm sorry for everything.
I keep repeating my mistakes, but I'm trying to change.
Trying to do things different.
Wow.
Ricky, you can't be serious.
Seven-carat serious.
You like it? Look at that.
What you think?
You really believe you're ready for marriage?
'Cause after all, I mean, you know this is an engagement ring, right?
Well...
'Cause I know you don't think I'm so stupid
to where I would just accept a bullshit apology ring.
- No, baby, 'cause this is what... - No, you listen to me.
There is no ring, no house, no car,
not even the Hope fucking Diamond can buy my forgiveness.
Baby, that's... That's a $400,000 ring!
Kobe spent four million, you delusional prick!
He makes more than me!
Baby, come back!
Baby! Baby, come back!
Baby, come back!
I got it, I got it, I got it.
Baby! Baby! Baby!
We can get married if you want to!
Do you mind if I sit or are you expecting someone else?
No, please do.
- Here's your G&T, Angie. - Thank you, Tommy.
Hope I'm not cramping your style again.
- What do you mean? - At your big party.
You looked at me like I wasn't even there.
Angie, come on. I had a lot going on that night.
Really?
Okay, I'm sorry.
- Is that what you wanted to hear? - No.
What I wanted was to see your face
when you handed me my money.
And you denied me that,
so I'm taking my product elsewhere.
Angie, you can't do this. Don't do that.
Yeah, I'm doing that.
Look, if this gets out, Vernon is gonna be ruined.
Oh, poor baby doesn't get his multimillion-dollar deal with the Cowboys.
Boo-fucking-hoo.
Why are you even dragging him into this?
If you needed money, why didn't you just come to me?
Don't pretend you care, Spencer.
I'm not one of your clients.
I'm just another chick at the party you guys pass around for kicks.
When did I ever pass you around?
- You're part of it. - Part of what?
The boys' club, your little fucking wolf packs.
Whether or not you choose to admit it, it's true.
- I treated you right. - Really?
- Yeah, we had good times. - During all those good times,
did we ever have a conversation beyond how good I look,
if I want another drink, or where I want to hang out?
We talked about a lot of stuff.
Your job, your modeling. We talked about your pottery.
I'm a 31-year-old concierge clerk
who spends her nights shaking her ass at Liv
and her mornings trying to earn a degree,
all while raising a son.
Did you ever know any of those things?
I knew about the Liv thing.
But when did you have a kid?
- Are you scared he's yours? - Is he?
Is that what this is all about?
God, it'd be so easy
to fuck with you right now and say that he is.
Angie, look, I'm really sorry...
that you feel passed around.
Okay? I'm sorry that you're having a tough time making ends meet.
And I'm really fucking sorry that I ditched you the way I did.
I was a fucking asshole and I did a lot of shitty things that I'm not proud of.
But Vernon's a good kid, and if these pictures get out,
not only is his contract gonna get killed,
but whatever little innocence he has left
is gonna get completely fucking destroyed.
And whatever I gotta do to protect that, I'll do it.
See? That wasn't so difficult.
Your level of sincerity was pitch-perfect.
I'll take that check now.
Here they are, okay?
Every photo of Vernon and a couple good ones of you.
Thank you.
You still a tequila man?
Tommy, two tequilas, please. For old times' sake.